Breaking Point
by The Donna Specter
Summary: A Suits/Darvey fic. Set after 7x10 - What would happen if Donna hadn't just run out after kissing Harvey? After things changed between her and Harvey, Donna made the decision to leave New York. What happens when she returns almost four years later to be with her sick Father?
1. Chapter 1

As she stares out of the cab window, the sound of her barely three-year-old daughter's voice snaps Donna out of her daydream.

"Momma?"

"Yeah baby?" She answers warmly, wrapping her arm around her daughter's shoulder.

"Why are you sad?"

"I'm just sad that Grandpa Jim is sick, honey" Donna says.

James 'Jim' Paulsen had been diagnosed with a brain tumour two and a half years ago; after an eighteen month battle, he had happily remained in remission for six months before they had found another tumour; a tumour that had now given him a terminal diagnosis.

The medication he was on could prolong his life, for how long no one could say for sure. But, one thing was certain, this would eventually take his life.

It was upon hearing that news that Donna had decided to move home, back to New York, so that Hope could spend as much time as possible with her Grandfather.

Donna had left New York almost four years ago, she had packed up her life, rented out her apartment and made the move to Chicago, determined to never look back; life seemed to have had other plans.

Moving away was to this day one of the hardest things she'd ever done. Leaving her family, her friends, her home.

Leaving him.

"Me too" Hope says, snuggling closer to her Mom.

"Seeing you is going to make him feel so much better though." Donna says softly.

"How do you know that, Momma?"

"I just do" Donna smiles, tucking a strand of long strawberry blonde hair behind Hope's ear.

Donna's cell phone echoes through the small space, rummaging through her bag she manages to locate the device, Mark's name flashing on the screen.

"Hello?" Donna answers.

"Hey, just checking you arrived ok?" Mark says.

"Yeah, we landed not long ago." Donna explains, "…We're just in a cab on the way to Dad's now"

"Is she still awake?"

"Are you kidding?" Donna laughs, "She didn't stop talking the whole flight! Not a chance she was going to miss any of it"

Mark laughs at the thought.

"You wanna talk to her?" Donna says, smiling at the thought of her chatty mini me.

"Yeah."

"Hello?" Hope says, accepting the cell from her Mom.

"Hey princess, how was your flight?"

"It was sooooo good!" she says before launching in to a vivid recount of their trip thus far.

Five minutes later Mark manages to get a word in, happy to hear his baby so excited.

"I love you angel, be good for your Mom, ok?"

"I will." She promises.

"How much do I love you?"

"To the moon and back." She answers, reciting the familiar words.

Donna smiles as she listens to Hope's side of the conversation.

She had never expected to rekindle things with Mark but after things had gone from bad to worse and she made the decision to leave New York; she found herself being drawn back to him, re-igniting the flame between them. Not long after they found out she was pregnant and the rest, as they say, was history.

…At least for a while it was.

Looking over at the sight of the New York skyline coming in to view, her mind instantly travels back to the night everything changed, the night her world deviated on to a path more different than she had ever imagined.

It had all happened so fast; one second, she was listening to Louis pour his heart out about Sheila, the next, she had found herself kissing him.

Harvey.

She'd never meant to put him in that position, it was as if she had no control over her actions, her body simply acting on impulse as the realisation of Louis' words hit her, her arms automatically draping themselves over his shoulders before pulling him closer as her lips pressed against his firmly, desperately seeking the answer she needed.

She could not risk losing him.

* * *

* FLASHBACK *

"I'm sorry, Harvey, I just had to know"

Her head was spinning as she quickly walked away.

"Donna!" He called out, running after her as the shock of what had just happened wore off.

She just kept walking, not knowing what would come out of her mouth right now, with her in such a vulnerable state.

"Donna"

She had thought kissing him would prove Rachel and Mike and Louis wrong.

It didn't.

Fuck, she thinks to herself as she picks up the pace, trying to get to the elevator before he can stop her.

"Donna!" He repeats, his fingers wrapping around her arm as he forces her to stop. "Wha …What the hell was that?" He asks, confusion still etched on his face.

Donna shakes her head, attempting to walk away again, only to be stopped by him once more.

"Donna…"

"It was a kiss, Harvey!" She begins, her tone slightly more frustrated than she intended

"Why would you kiss me?" He asks, genuinely confused and still reeling from the feeling of her lips on his for the first time in well over a decade.

"You know I'm with…"

"I know!" She interjects, not wanting to hear her name. "…I know."

She sighs, "I'm sorry, Harvey."

"I don't need you to be sorry, I need you to tell me what the hell's going on."

"I just… I – I can't do this" Donna says, backtracking towards her office, realising that in her haste she'd forgotten her purse and her keys.

Harvey remained no more than two steps behind her, following her closely the entire way.

"Would you just stop?!" He demands.

Donna ignores him, reaching down to open the draw where she kept her personal items.

"God damn it, Donna, answer me! What the hell is going on?! What was tha…"

"I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU!" She shouts, exasperated.

Harvey's mouth drops at the revelation.

"I love you. I'm in love with you, Harvey and I needed to know for sure before I lost you forever"

"Lost me?" He says softly, still trying to wrap his head around the situation.

"I spoke to Louis earlier and he is heartbroken over Sheila, he is drowning in regret because he didn't tell her how he feels and now he has to watch her marry someone else." She says softly.

"…and I just …I just needed to know."

"Donna."

"Please don't." she whispers, her façade beginning to crumble in front of him.

"I just want to go. Please, just forget that ever happened and let me go home." she begs, scooping up her purse and making a beeline for the door.

Harvey uses his arm to stop her, blocking her from moving past him.

"Harvey." She whispers, wiping a tear off her cheek. "I'm sorry. Please just…"

Her words are cut off as he crashes his lips against hers, his hands slowly moving to cradle her face.

The kiss is firm but gentle, as he breaks away slowly his eyes lock with hers, his thumb gently wiping the tear on her other cheek away.

"What are you…" She begins to say before she's cut off by another kiss.

Harvey's tongue finds its way in to her mouth, moving sensually against hers as he tilts his head to deepen the kiss.

His hands make their way to her waist, lifting her and walking them towards the desk, sitting her on top of it.

Their movements become hurried, desperate, almost primal; a physical need taking over for both of them.

A deep sigh leaves her as Harvey's lips find her neck, kissing his way down to her collarbone to suck at the point that he remembers drives her crazy as she unbuttons his shirt. An involuntary "fuck" escapes her as she moves to his pants, pulling them down just enough as he unzips her dress, peeling the material off her upper body.

Harvey loops his fingers under the sides of her lace panties, pulling them down swiftly before moving so that her legs wrap around him once more.

Donna spreads her legs wider as he instantly pushes in to her, welcoming the move and relishing in the feeling of Harvey being inside for the first time in over a decade.

"Jesus, Donna." He moans, the exquisite feeling of her overwhelming him; he'd like to say he'd forgotten how tight she was or perfect she felt, but he'd be lying.

The truth is, he's never forgotten anything about her.

"Harvey…" She whimpers as he continues thrusting inside her, deep, hard, urgent; his tongue seeking refuge in her mouth, as he kisses her passionately.

Within mere minutes they are both reaching breaking point, Donna first, closely followed by Harvey; succumbing to a combination of their physical need for each other and having spent far too long apart.

Harvey rests his forehead against hers, her hands still gripping on to him tightly, their rapid breaths mingling as they try to regain some semblance of composure.

"Harvey, I..." She begins, before being cut off by his lips returning to hers, his tongue sneaking out to move sensually against hers.

As he gently breaks their kiss his eyes lock with hers; she can feel the passion and intensity between them, but she can also see the confliction in his face.

He's just done the one thing he thought he'd never do.

Before she can say a word, he's whispering a strangled "I love you" in her direction and leaving as fast as he can, exiting the room before he's even finished straightening up his clothes.

* END OF FLASHBACK *

* * *

"GRANDPA JIM!" Hope shouts, spotting her Grandfather as they enter his New York townhouse.

"There she is!" He smiles, spreading his arms wide and bracing himself to catch his granddaughter as she launches herself at him. "…How's my favourite Granddaughter?" He smiles, squeezing her tight.

"Hi Dad." Donna smiles, walking towards them.

"Hi honey."

"How are you feeling?" She asks, placing a soft kiss on his cheek.

"Some days are better than others " He shrugs, "…But today's a good day." He says, smiling down at Hope.

"…How are you?" He queries.

"Better now I've seen you!" She answers honestly.

Placing Hope down, Jim embraces his daughter, hugging her firmly.

"I'm glad you're home, honey"

"Me too Daddy" She says quietly, hugging him back tightly.

* * *

Donna scans the bookshelf in front of her, smiling at the sound of her daughter's laughter echoing through the room. Her own smile faltering sadly when her gaze falls upon a particular photo.

"Look, Grandpa!" Hope says, attempting her tenth pirouette in the space of thirty seconds.

"Careful there darling." Jim warns "…Even ballerina's get dizzy!"

"Not me!" She boasts.

"Be careful" He repeats, "…if you're too dizzy, you won't be able to open the present I have for you." He says with a smile as he exits the room to find the package.

"For me?!" She says, excitedly. "Momma, Grandpa got me a present!"

Donna stares at the photo in her hands, not noticing the commotion behind her.

"Momma!" Hope repeats.

"Hmm?" Donna says, her attention snapping back in to the present moment.

"Grandpa got me a present!" The little girl repeats, smiling brightly.

"Aren't you lucky?!" Donna smiles, half-heartedly.

"Here it is."James says, returning to the girls 'side, "Now I bought this for your Mom when she was about your age, I hope you like it just as much as she did."

Hope begins to unwrap the present, slowly revealing a beautiful pink and gold porcelain music box.

"Wow" She says, in awe "It's very pretty, Grandpa."

"Open it." He encourages.

She slowly lifts the lid to reveal a porcelain ballerina, rotating to the tune of Tchaikovsky's Swan Lake.

"It's a pretty Ballerina." Hope says.

"Just like you, honey." James smiles, earning himself a big smile from the girl.

"…and do you know what that says?" He asks, pointing to the wording on engraved plaque at the front of the box.

Hope shakes her head explaining, "I can't read."

 ** _"To my princess, I love you infinity times infinity, Love Dad."_**

Jim reads.

"Is that a lot?" She asks.

"It is bigger than anything you can imagine."

"Wow." She repeats as her grandfather winds the music box up again for her. "I just say to the moon and back ...and that's far!"

Donna blinks back tears at the heart-warming scene in front of her.

"Hey…" James says, noticing his daughter, "Are you ok? I didn't mean to upset you, honey."

"No, Dad. You didn't." She says wiping her eyes, "it's beautiful, thank you. I just"

"…What is it?"

"He took this photo of me you know" She sniffs, referring to the photo frame in her hands, in it a beautiful candid black and white photo of her laughing; Blissful, care-free, _happy._

"That's my favourite photo of you" James smiles. "You look so happy"

"He kept trying to make me laugh that day" She explains.

"Donna…"

"I have to tell him; whether he wants to see me or not. I have to tell him he has a…"

James nods, understanding what his daughter means. "Life's to short for regrets, sweetie. Trust me. It's not too late"

"Grandpa?" Hope says, oblivious to the adult's conversation "…What are these words?" she asks, pointing to the other letters etched in to the plaque.

"D. R. P." James reads, which are initials, letters, from your Mommy's name" He explains.

"…And these" He says, pointing to the freshly engraved letters next to it "…are your initials, because this is yours now and maybe one day you will pass it on to your own daughter."

"H. R. S." James says, pointing out the letters to the young girl.

Hope Rachel Specter.

* * *

 _ **Please let me know what you think x**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Thank you so much to those of you who took the time to leave me a review, I really appreciate it.**_

 _ **Ok, just to clarify, Donna and Mark are not together anymore, Harvey is unaware he has a daughter (you will find out why as we go along) and I am aware that for Hope to have his surname, both Parents would have had to sign forms etc. but, that's the beauty of fiction, for the sake of this story, just pretend that's not the case.**_

* * *

"Are you comfortable?" Donna asks, tucking her daughter in.

"Yeah, I like this bed, Momma."

"Have a good sleep, angel. I love you."

"I love you to the moon and back!"

"Wow, that much, huh?" Donna smiles, stroking the little girls' cheek.

"Mhmm." Hope nods.

Donna leans down to rub her nose against her daughter's. "I love you, infinity times infinity."

"Just like Grandpa?" Hope asks.

"Just like Grandpa."

Hope smiles lovingly up at her Mother.

"Come on, missy, we have a busy day tomorrow."

"Goodnight, Momma."

"Sweet dreams, angel." Donna whispers, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

* * *

"Is she asleep?" James asks as Donna returns to the living room.

"Out like a light!" She confirms.

"Thought you could use one of these." He says, offering her a glass of red wine.

"Thanks." She says, accepting the glass.

"So …do you want to talk about it?" He asks.

"About what?"

"Harvey."

"Dad…" She begins hesitantly.

"Look, I've never pushed you on this topic because I remember what a mess you were when you left, and I remember how much he hurt you…" James begins.

"Now, I wasn't always his biggest fan , but I know that you loved him, you would have done anything for him …so, what happened? What changed?"

"He did." She says softly.

"…Or I did, maybe we both did, I don't know, Dad." She says with a sigh " _we_ changed"

James remained silent, giving his daughter the opportunity to keep going.

"He just couldn't get past it."

"Past what?"

Donna takes a deep, shakey breath.

"…Do you really want to know the dramatics of your daughter's love life?"

"I really want to help you, however I can." James smiles, gently.

Donna pauses for a moment, gathering her thoughts, "It all started few weeks before I left New York…" She begins.

"We had been dealing with this really intense case at work and a guy I used to work with wanted to put me on the stand to try and get to Harvey …Anyway, Harvey was seeing this …woman …named Paula, she was his therapist and…"

"Wait, what?!" Jim exclaimed. "Harvey was dating his therapist?!"

"Yep!" Donna answered, putting an emphasis on the letter p.

"Wow."

"Yeah."

"Okay…" James says, urging her to continue.

"I should really preface this by saying Harvey has _huge_ intimacy issues and absolutely zero tolerance for infidelity of any kind, because of something that happened with his family when he was a boy."

James nods in acknowledgement "Okay, noted."

"Anyway, he was dating _her_ and I had recently reconnected with Mark, albeit unsuccessfully." Donna continues.

"Because he was still married…"

"Right." She nods.

"…I was feeling pretty low, I was confused and upset, upset that Harvey had turned to someone else, upset that Mark was married or that I almost compromised my own beliefs; but mostly, upset and confused that I didn't know why. I'd known Harvey forever and seen him practically sleep his way through New York and never blinked an eye, but suddenly it really bothered me."

James offers her a comforting rub against her shoulder, nodding silently.

"It bothered me that he was with her, it bothered me that she thought she knew him better than I did and it just…"

"Bothered you." James finishes for her.

"And I hated that it did." She whispers, shaking her head. Deja vu hitting her, as she remembers saying practically the same thing to Rachel years ago.

"I tried to get past it, I did. I tried dating, I tried to distance myself from him, I even returned his spare key that he'd given me. A key that he then gave to her…" she adds sadly.

"Donna…" James begins.

"No, it's ok, Dad" She assures him.

"Anyway, I was subpoenaed by the Attorney General's office to testify for this case and tensions were really high around the firm, I could tell it was really bothering Harvey, but…"

"…It wasn't your place to bring it up." James finishes.

"No. So, when we got the subpoena, we asked Louis to prepare me beforehand just like he had done once before. But, we when the time came, he thought that because I worked for Harvey at the DA's office, it would be covered under privilege and I wouldn't have to take the stand at all."

She pauses briefly to take another sip of wine.

"…But, we were wrong about the information he had and he absolutely ripped me apart on that stand. It was …bad." She shudders, the memory of how brutal Malik was still vivid in her mind.

"I'm sorry, honey."

"I was _so_ mad at Louis for not preparing me." She sighs.

"The following day I attempted to get the woman responsible to come forward, but had no luck. Luckily though, Harvey had come up with a plan. Then, Mike …do you remember Mike?"

James nods.

"Mike came to see me, I can only assume after talking to his fiancée, my friend Rachel."

"Talking to her about what?"

"Harvey …of course." She chuckles weakly, "She asked me if I regretted putting Harvey above Mark and I told her that I felt like I regretted putting Harvey above myself. I mean, what the hell did I get? I was completely alone. He had everything; career, relationship he even reconnected with his family."

"If I remember correctly, honey, wasn't it you that helped him mend that relationship?" James asks.

Donna says nothing, taking another sip of wine, sadness starting to overwhelm her.

"So, Mike came to see me and out of nowhere tells me I need to tell Harvey how I feel and that if I didn't, I could lose him forever."

"Did you?"

"No. I told him he was crazy and that I know he meant well, but we didn't feel that way about each other."

"Did you really believe that?" He asks gently.

Donna sighs, "At the time I thought I did. I guess I'd spent so long pushing my feelings aside, that I didn't even realise how I truly felt. I couldn't get what Mike said out of my head and then later Louis came to apologize to me and told me how he had messed up my case because of how he felt about his ex. He was talking about how hard it was to watch her with someone else and that he had to watch his soulmate marry someone else, because he didn't tell her how he felt…"

"And it made you think of Harvey?" James asks.

"Between Mike and Louis, it was the equivalent of an emotional hit and run. My head was spinning; I was so confused, I couldn't bear the thought of not having Harvey in my life and then he suddenly walked in and I just…" Donna says, getting the words out before inhaling another deep breath.

"…I kissed him."

"While he was with someone else?"

"Yes."

"Was he angry?"

A laugh escapes her at the thought.

"No. Shocked more like it." She explains, "But, one thing led to another and…"

"Oh." James says, understanding the insinuation.

Choosing to look past the awkwardness of what his daughter had just revealed, James continues.

"And that was the night Hope was conceived?"

Donna looks up at her Father slightly awkwardly.

"Actually, no; that was a couple of weeks later."

"Ok, you've lost me, Donna. How did you go from being together, twice, to leaving New York?"

"Because of his history, Harvey was never able to get past what we did. In his eyes, I was someone he trusted completely, and I let him down."

"Well that hardly seems fair, you were both…"

"That's just Harvey, Dad. He's never been emotionally equipped to deal with anything beyond a brief relationship and even that's at a stretch."

"…Our relationship changed after that first night, his demeanour changed, work was awkward, he was moody, he'd snap at me over the smallest things all the time, it felt like he suddenly hated me. Even knowing Harvey as well as I did and realising the reason he was acting that way, I still felt awful." She admits sadly.

"I just felt lost and I didn't know how to fix it; I thought the damage had been done and so I made the decision to resign. I got the job in Chicago, packed up my things, left my letter of resignation on Harvey's desk and left."

James leans over to grab the bottle of wine, refilling both their glasses.

"But, when he found the letter he came to my apartment and tried to get me to stay."

"Why didn't you?"

"Because even though I could tell he meant what he was saying, it wasn't the same and I knew we couldn't go back. We were done."

"Honey, I'm sorry, that must have been so hard for you."

"I think it was hard for both of us." She says sombrely, before taking another sip.

"I didn't want to leave it like that though, so I asked if he wanted to come inside and he said yes, and we ended up… I stupidly thought then that maybe we had a chance. But, then when I woke up, he was gone, and I knew that was it."

Donna half heartedly laughs, "You know, the ironic thing is that I thought that night was the end, you know? A way to say goodbye and finally move on from Harvey Specter. Apparently, fate had other plans though, because after that night I now have something that reminds me of him every single day."

"Life's a fickle thing, Donna."

They sit quietly for a moment before James speaks again.

"Did you try to get in touch with him before you left?"

"Once. I went to his apartment, but she was there…"

"Donna…"

"So, I left" She interjects. "…He made his choice and so did I."

"I went to Chicago, changed my number and he remained here with her. Mark got divorced, we got back together, and he stood by me through all of it. He knows she's not his and he loves her anyway, Dad. He's been a wonderful Father figure for Hope, the only one she's ever known."

"No-one's disputing that." James agrees.

"…But have you ever asked yourself why things didn't work out with Mark?"

"Dad…"

"Honey, listen to me. Mark is great, I like Mark, he's been there for you both, even after you broke up, he's been a great friend to you and a great Uncle to Hope"

"So?"

"So, ask yourself why it didn't work, why would a relationship where he was as committed to the both of you as he was, not work out?"

"I didn't love him in the same way he loved me."

"Why?"

"Because…" Donna begins before stopping herself.

"Why, Donna?" James asks again.

"…Because he wasn't Harvey." She admits quietly, as Jim gives her shoulder a gentle squeeze.

"God, I sound pathetic" She laughs disbelievingly, running her hand through her hair.

"You weren't pathetic, Donna. You were just in love" James says.

"…With someone who didn't love me back."

"You don't know that."

"Actually, I do. After I found out I was pregnant I tried to contact him; he had changed his number, every message I left for him at the firm remained unanswered, I even tried emailing him. Nothing!" Donna says, exasperated.

"I needed to talk to tell him and he just shut me out completely."

James eyebrows furrowed at the revelation. He knew Harvey was a lot of things, but he'd never known him to be a coward.

"That doesn't sound like the Harvey Specter I knew." James says, recalling the times Harvey had confronted him and put him in his place. He came across as an arrogant son of a bitch in the process, but if one thing was clear, it was that he loved Donna and would do anything to protect her.

"That's what I kept telling myself" Donna scoffs "…But after a while I realised that Harvey was gone, and all the attempts just seemed futile."

"…So, I gave up! I was exhausted, I had a baby on the way and my focus needed to be on her."

"So, why now?"

"Because, Harvey can feel what he wants about me, I can deal with that, but she didn't do anything! She deserves to know her Father" Donna says, wiping away a tear that had fallen, her Motherly instinct to protect her baby kicking in.

"…Maybe I should have kept trying to contact him, but I was just so tired." Donna says, bursting in to tears "Why do I always have to be the strong one, the one that fixes everything?! When's my turn? Who fixes me?" She sobs.

James moves closer to wrap his daughter up in a loving hug, stroking her back gently.

"I'm here" He whispers, as he strokes her hair.

"Honey, I know my being sick has been tough on you and I am so grateful that you have moved home to be with me. But, take it from me, life's too short to be anything other than happy."

"I love you, Dad" She sniffs.

"I love you too sweetheart …infinity times infinity"

* * *

"Hope Rachel Specter, you are not bringing all those stuffed animals with us!" Donna says, watching her daughter struggling to hold an armful of plush toys. "You can bring one." She reasons.

"Five!" Hope bargains.

"One!" Donna says firmly.

"Four?"

"Two. Final offer" Donna negotiates.

"Ok." Hope says, a small pout gracing her lips causing Donna's heart to melt as her daughter stares up at her with her gorgeous, familiar, brown eyes.

"Ugh! Fine, three." Donna concedes.

"Thank you, Momma!" Hope squeals, her perfect smile spreading across her face as she launches herself at her Mother's legs, clinging to them in a tight hug.

"Okay, but it's going to be none if we don't get a move on, we can't be late for Grandpa's appointment, so let's go!"

"I just gots to get my bag!" Hope says, running back up the stairs.

"Jesus, if there was any doubting who her Father was, there's the answer!" James jokes, motioning towards his granddaughter.

"Tell me about it! I didn't think negotiation skills were genetic and yet, exhibit A!" Donna laughs as she points towards the now empty staircase.

"She has your taste in accessories though" He says, causing Donna to laugh. "Are you ok after last night?" Jim asks cautiously.

"Surprisingly, yeah" Donna admits, "It was nice to get it off my chest and properly talk about it. Thanks, Dad"

"Any time, sweetheart. Have you thought anymore about talking to him?"

"Not really, I have no idea how I'm going to cope seeing him after all this time, let alone to start that conversation"

"What about, Hi Harvey, I gave birth to your daughter three years ago, what's new with you?" James jokes.

Donna gives her Father a sideways glance.

"Too soon?" He asks.

"Too soon!"

* * *

"Grandpa, where's Momma?" Hope asks as she walks along the sidewalk, holding his hand.

"She's just getting some medicine to help make me feel better" Jim explains.

"That's good." Hope says, "Once, I was sick, but Momma gave me some Rob-o-tusin and it made me feel better. Maybe she can buy that for you?" Hope offers sweetly.

"Maybe honey, Maybe." James smiles down at his granddaughter as they sit down on a nearby bench.

"OH NO!" Hope shrieks.

"What?" James says, alarmed.

"I lost Mason!" Hope says, noticing the missing bear.

"That's ok, we can walk back and try find him." Jim says.

"Oh, there he is!" Hope says spotting the stuffed animal a few yards back "Can I get him, Grandpa"

"Sure honey, I'm watching." He says, watching closely as she runs to get the bear.

Just as she reaches it, a man bends over to pick it up.

"Is this yours?" He asks, offering her the bear with a smile. "Don't want to lose him!"

Hope nods, taking it from him, "Thank you" She says sweetly before running back to her Grandfather shouting happily that she got him back.

* * *

Mike waits out the front of the wedding planner's office, he and Rachel have a quick meeting scheduled during their lunch break.

He dials Rachel's number from his cell.

"Hey, I'm out the front? How far away are you?" He asks.

"Literally one minute away, just around the corner, see you in a sec" Rachel explains from her end.

As Mike hangs up the phone he notices something in his peripheral vision; a teddy bear that reminds him of one he had as a child. As he scoops down to pick it up he notices the gorgeous little girl running towards him.

"Is this yours?" He asks, holding out the bear to her "…Don't want to lose him!" he smiles.

"Thank you" The little girl says politely, offering him a sweet smile before running back to where she came from.

"Hey baby" Rachel says, coming up behind him.

"Hey" Mike says, eyes still focused on the little girl.

"What is it?" Rachel asks, her eyes following her fiancées line of sight.

"It's the craziest thing" Mike says, turning back to look at Rachel, "..this little girl dropped her bear and she just reminded me so much of…"

"Donna" Rachel says, shocked.

"Yeah, how'd you know that?" Mike laughs.

"No, Mike. It's Donna." Rachel reiterates, pointing ahead.

The stunned couple frozen on the spot as they watch Donna exit the drug store and scoop up the little girl before climbing in to the awaiting taxi, completely unaware of the shocked pair watching them.

* * *

 ** _Would love if you'd leave a review to let me know what you think so far! x_**


	3. Chapter 3

**_Thank you so much to those who reviewed chapter 2, I really appreciate the feedback._**

 _ **Let's just say Harvey's behaviour might make more sense soon…**_

* * *

* FLASHBACK *

Harvey knew something wasn't right the second he walked in to his office, call it instinct, he felt sick to his stomach but was unsure why …until he saw it; the letter.

He knows what it is before he's even opened it.

It's her resignation letter.

He's barely opened the envelope and made it through the first paragraph before he's running out the door, letter in hand, desperate to change her mind.

He hails himself the first taxi he sees and before long, finds himself standing in front of her door, knocking rapidly as he stares at the familiar numbers.

"Harvey, what are you doing here?"

"What is this?" He asks, thrusting the piece of paper against her.

"Thought that was pretty obvious." She says sarcastically, taking it from him.

"Donna…"

"I can't do this anymore, Harvey." She whispers in defeat.

"You can't leave."

"You don't need me, Harvey, you'll be fine."

"Donna please…"

"We've barely talked in weeks." She sighs.

"I know and I'm sorry, I just couldn't…" He begins.

"I know." She interjects.

"You do?"

"Of course, I do. I really am sorry, Harvey. I never meant to put you in that position."

"I know you didn't, I do, it just …it made me think of…" He tries to explain.

"I'm sorry." She repeats, well aware of what he's thinking of.

"Donna, I know things have been tense and I know I'm not good at dealing with emotions, but you don't have to leave."

"That's not why I'm leaving."

Harvey just looks at her, cocking his head to the side slightly.

"Well, not the only reason." She adds.

"Then why?" He asks.

"I just need a change; I've been offered another job and I just feel like the time is right to take it. There's nothing here for me anymore."

"I'm here." He says sadly, "I need you. The firm needs you."

"The firm will be fine, you're doing an amazing job as Managing Partner" She says softly, "…And our relationship has changed, you know it and I know it."

"Donna…"

"I know your heart is in the right place in trying to get me to stay, Harvey, but I need you to let me go. _Please._ " She begs. "I've based my decisions on you for close to fourteen years. This is something I want to, have to, do for me."

He takes a deep, unsteady breath before stepping forward, taking her hands in his, as he places a gentle kiss against her temple.

"Good luck, Donna." He whispers.

As he turns around Donna musters up the strength to invite him inside.

"Do you want to come in?" She asks.

It's an olive branch of sorts, she doesn't want them to part on bad terms, or sad terms.

The question takes him by surprise, causing him to turn around and look at her.

"It's just a drink, Harvey."

He nods, silently accepting her invitation and following her inside.

* * *

Harvey sits on her couch as she pours them both a glass of wine. His mind instantly travelling back to the last time they were in her apartment, doing this very thing.

The night he told her he loved her.

"As my final task at the firm, I've finished arranging everything you need for the name change. I sent it to Louis about an hour ago." she explains, sitting down beside him, attempting to ease the awkwardness with small talk.

"Thanks." He says, accepting the wine glass and responding to her statement.

He takes a sip of wine before continuing, "Specter Litt just doesn't sound right"

"I think it sounds pretty good" She encourages.

"I don't think I'm ready."

"You are. You just need to have faith in yourself" She smiles before taking another sip of wine.

That perfect smile.

"And what if I shit the bed?" He asks.

"Then, you'll find a way to fix it, because that's what you do." she says confidently, her hand automatically resting on his knee as she delivers the comforting words, almost on impulse.

The contact causes both their hearts to beat a little faster.

Harvey takes a deep breath, finishing his glass of wine as he musters up the courage to ask the question he's been wondering for weeks.

"Donna, why did you kiss me that night in your office?"

"Harvey..."

"Please." He begs, "I just need to know."

"Because, I was trying to figure out how I felt about you." She says softly, noticing that his eyebrows furrow slightly at the explanation.

Oh fuck it, she thinks, she's leaving anyway.

"I was talking with Mike the night before and he told me to tell you how I felt" She begins.

"How you felt?"

"It took me by surprise too. I walked in to my office and he was waiting for me, just before you were going to see Malik. He started talking about how if it wasn't for me, he wouldn't be with Rachel and if he didn't speak up and let me lose something that could make me as happy as them, that he'd never forgive himself."

Harvey is stunned, completely blindsided by the news that Mike had somehow been involved.

"I told him that as much as I appreciated where his heart was, you and I didn't want to be together."

Harvey does his best to ignore the way that statement makes him feel.

"…But, I couldn't get what he said out of my head, I keep thinking about it and thinking about our relationship over the years and then the next night Louis..."

"Talked about losing Sheila." Harvey recalls what Donna had told him the night of the kiss.

Donna nods, "He came to apologise to me for not preparing me for Malik and he told me that he had slept with Sheila, even though she's engaged, and that when he was thinking of questions to ask me, he kept imagining himself being questioned. He told me that because he didn't tell her how he felt, he had to watch as his soulmate marries someone else. She couldn't see that her perfect match had been there all along..."

"Shit." Harvey whispers, realisation setting in.

"I was speechless. When he left, all I could think about was you and wondering if they were right. I imagined what my life would be like without you and I just..." She says.

"Donna..." He says softly.

"…And then you walked in and I didn't think, I just..."

"Kissed me." He finishes.

"…I was just really confused, and I just wanted to know. I needed to know"

"How it made you feel?"

She nods again.

"You said you were in love with me."

Donna sighs, getting up to refill her now empty glass.

"I know what I said." She answers.

"And do you remember what I said?" He asks softly.

"Of course I do, Harvey." She says, pouring herself another glass, "But, you had a girlfriend, you have a girlfriend. We shouldn't have..."

"No, I don't." He says, suddenly behind her.

Donna puts the glass down, turning to face him.

"What?" She whispers, surprised.

"I broke up with Paula." He explains.

"When?"

"The next day."

"Why? God, Harvey, if this is because you feel like I made you..."

"No." He says firmly, "It's because I didn't know that I wanted to hear you say that to me."

"Harvey." She whispers, shaking her head, disbelieving the words he's saying.

"You didn't make me do anything that night, Donna. I wanted to, it was just as much me as it was you." He says, "I don't want you thinking that this is somehow your fault. I know I've been a mess and I haven't dealt with this very well at all, but I didn't know how to deal with it."

"With us?" She asks.

"No, with becoming the one thing in life I was certain I'd never be."

"I'm..."

"Don't." He demands. "Don't say you're sorry, because I'm not. I know afterwards I made a mess of things but it's because I didn't know how to deal with the fact that I wasn't sorry. I knew that if it happened again I'd do it all over again."

Donna is speechless, her head is spinning as she tries to process the information.

"The only thing I'm sorry for, is how I handled things afterwards. That, I'll always regret." He admits.

As he sees the tears welling up in her eyes, he acts in instinct, pressing his lips against hers gently, pulling back to determine whether he'd gone too far, searching her face for an answer.

Relief washes over him as she leans in to kiss him back, her left hand reaching up to grip the back of his head, pulling him closer.

Thank God.

Harvey slants his mouth over hers, deepening the kiss as his tongue moves against hers. His hand cups the sides of her head, his fingers half burying themselves in her auburn locks. Their kiss quickly moving from PG to R as Harvey kisses her passionately, Donna kissing him back with ardour.

A breathy gasp escapes her as Harvey moves to her neck, leaving a sensual trail down her neck with his tongue and lips.

They pause momentarily, foreheads resting against one another as they attempt to catch their breaths.

Donna is the first to break away, taking Harvey's hand in her own as she turns towards her bedroom. Harvey pulls her back towards him with a firm tug, kissing her again as he she drapes her arms around his neck. His hands move down over her ass before he lifts her up. The swift move eliciting a surprised moan from Donna, her mouth currently occupied by his tongue. She wraps her legs around his waist as he walks them towards her bedroom.

He places her down gently at the side of her bed, only breaking their kiss to begin undressing each other.

Her hands move to pull his jacket off his shoulders before beginning to undo his tie. His hands descend to the bottom of her sweater, lifting it up and over her head. He looks down at her, a smile tugging at his lips, as she begins unbuttoning the buttons on his shirt, undoing them slowly, while his hands caress her bare arms. Donna leans in to kiss his chest, sucking lightly, resulting in him letting out a light moan and dropping his head back while she pushes the shirt off his shoulders, letting it flutter to the floor, she take the opportunity to kiss and suck on his Adam's apple; At this, he lets out a long quivering breath and his hands travel up to her hair, smoothing it back off of her face.

Their breaths are rapid as he reaches for the clasp of her bra, slowly, his hands drag across her skin as he rids her of the garment, exposing her chest to him. His hands pause at her breasts long enough to brush his thumbs across her nipples gently, as he continues down towards the buttons of her jeans, quickly ridding her of those too while kicking off his own shoes and socks as Donna hastily undoes the buttons of his pants, quickly sending them with his boxers, to join the rest of their clothing on the floor.

Separated now by only her lace thong, Harvey doesn't know what to touch first, he just knows he wants every part of his skin touching every part of hers.

He lowers Donna gently down on the bed, kissing her softly, lovingly, as they move. She positions herself up against the pillows and Harvey follows, crawling up the bed until he's hovering above her.

"I do love you, Donna." He whispers, nudging his nose against hers.

"I love you too." She whispers sweetly.

Harvey places another chaste kiss against her lips before kissing and licking his way down her torso, stopping only when he reaches her panties, sliding the material off her legs before beginning a trail of soft sensuous kisses from her ankle, back up the length of her entire body.

Maybe, just maybe they can actually make this work, Donna thinks to herself as she looks down at him.

She strokes his cheek lovingly as he settles above her again, positioning himself as he kisses her back passionately. Her grip on him tightens as he enters her, filling her completely, both of them relishing in the exquisite feeling of them moving as one.

In this moment they are exactly where they need to be; together.

* * *

Flashbacks of the previous night flash in Harvey's mind as he begins to stir the following morning; the feel of her skin against his, the way her nails dug in to his skin as she urged him on, the way her body trembled against his as she climaxed and the perfect sound of his name spilling from her lips.

He drops soft kisses along the back of her shoulder as he smiles at the memories.

Donna sleepily rolls on to her stomach, stirring as a result of his touch.

Harvey smiles again, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, admiring her natural beauty. He wonders how the hell it has taken them this long as his fingers lightly trace over the freckles on her bare back, silently wishing that they could stay like this forever.

He lets himself think that after last night, they might actually have a chance at being happy, together.

She can stay.

She will stay.

Because of him.

As he watches her sleeping peacefully, her words from last night replay in his head.

 _"I know your heart is in the right place in trying to get me to stay, Harvey, but I need you to let me go. Please. …I've based my decisions on you for close to fourteen years. This is something I want to, have to, do for me."_

A sinking feeling appears in his stomach as he realises she's right; She has always made sacrifices for him and as much as it kills him, he needs to do the same for her.

The thought of her leaving makes him physically sick, but he knows after last night she will change her mind and stay for him, again.

If I love her, I need to respect her decision, he thinks to himself.

I have to put her first, I have to let her go.

He leans over to place a gentle kiss against her cheek, it takes everything in him to actually slip out of bed, trying not to wake her in the process.

He figures this will be easier; if he's leaves, she won't have the option to change her mind, to make yet another sacrifice for him.

It's time for him to make a sacrifice for her.

He quietly dresses and looks over at her one more time before slipping out the door.

There's no doubt in his mind; he's in love with Donna Paulsen.

* * *

A ray of light shining in from the window causes Donna to stir. She smiles to herself as last night's memories begin to flood her brain. She casually rolls over, expecting to be greeted by the sight of Harvey sleeping next to her.

Instead she's greeted by the sight of her empty bed.

Donna frowns, sitting up against the headboard.

"Harvey?" She calls out, hoping he's in just somewhere else in the apartment.

But deep down she knows, it's like Deja vu.

He's gone.

* * *

She's not sure why she's there, what was her plan going to be? Punch him? Yell at him?

How could he leave …AGAIN! One thing was for damn sure. She wants answers.

A myriad of curse words flowing through brain as she bangs on his front door.

This is just like the other time, she thinks to herself, sneaking out – running away - before I've woken up.

Not this time, Specter.

She was not expecting the sight in front of her when the door opens.

Paula.

"Paula. What are you? Uh, hi" Donna stutters.

"Hello, Donna." Paula says formally, an iciness evident in her tone.

"Is he home?" Donna asks tentatively.

Paula hesitates to answer.

"Look, Paula, I'm sorry. Everything that happened that night was completely my fault, not Harvey's" Donna admits, sincerely.

"…I kissed him, I initiated it, not him, he was completely taken by surprise! It was all me, I was just looking for an answer and blindsided him." She explains.

"…I never should have done that while he was with someone else and we never should have slept together. I'm so, so sorry my actions have hurt you, Paula, I know it doesn't mean much but that was never my intention. I realise this is probably the last thing you want to hear, but, I'm leaving town and I just wanted you to know, from me, I'm sorry."

Paula just continues to stare at her, before speaking calmly, "He's in the shower."

Donna is gobsmacked; Did Harvey lie?

Just last night he had told he had broken up with Paula.

"…And we're heading to brunch, so if you'll excuse us." She says coldly, beginning to close the door.

"Oh …and Donna? One more thing…" She says, pausing with the door half closed "…Stay the hell away from both of us!" She spits, slamming the door in her face.

Donna is stunned; her heart begins to race; a cold sweat starts to break out against her skin and she feels as if she's about to throw up.

How could he have lied to her like that?

In her daze she somehow manages to negotiate her way downstairs and out of his building.

If she had any doubts before about leaving, they were now gone.

She's done. Harvey Specter can go to hell.

As she walks away from his building, she's too distracted to notice Ray's Lexus pulling up across the road.

She doesn't see him get out of the car either.

* * *

Harvey's trying to talk himself out of calling her and begging her to stay for what seems like the hundredth time that morning as he opens the door to his penthouse.

He's meeting with a client at his house, upstate, and figures driving himself would be a welcome distraction.

His concentration is broken as he hears a familiar English accent.

"Hello, Harvey." She smiles, walking towards him, leaning up to place a soft kiss on his cheek.

"Paula." Harvey says, surprised. "Wha …What are you doing here?"

"I just wanted to return this." She explains, holding up his key, Donna's key.

"Okay." He says cautiously.

"Look, Harvey, our romantic relationship may have ended, and I certainly can't resume seeing you as your therapist again, but there's no reason we can't remain friends." She reasons, rather persuasively he'll admit.

"Yeah, I guess you're right." He agrees, "Thanks." He says, offering her a half smile as he takes the key back.

"Are you, okay, Harvey?" She queries.

"I thought you couldn't be my therapist anymore?"

"I can't, but I can be a friend."

Harvey sighs, "Donna resigned, effective immediately." He explains, "I guess I'm just struggling to see her move on after working together for so long." He lies, well aware of the reason he's struggling, but not in the mood for an impromptu, judgemental, therapy session with his now ex-girlfriend.

"I can't imagine how you must feel after so long" She says sympathetically, "…But don't worry, Harvey, I'm sure Donna will get exactly what she deserves." She adds.

"Thanks Paula." He says, missing her implication completely "…I've actually got a meeting though, so…" He begins, awkwardly.

"Oh no, it's fine" She dismisses, "I have my next patient in an hour, I just thought I'd return your key while I was in this part of town." She explains.

"Thanks, Paula, I guess I'll see you around then?"

"Count on it." She smiles, "Bye, Harvey." She says, heading towards the front door.

"Oh, shoot!" She says, feigning disappointment. "I need to check my emails, but my phone died, I'm waiting to hear back from a client about a rather pressing matter."

"Here, use mine." Harvey offers, passing her his cell, "I'm just going to the bathroom."

Paula takes the opportunity to swiftly type an email to Harvey's new secretary, Christina, from his email address.

* * *

 ** _Christina,_**

 ** _Due to recent events, I need you to cease any current and future correspondence from me with and including Donna Paulsen._**

 ** _This is a highly sensitive matter and I do not wish to discuss the matter further; Donna is no longer an employee at Pearson Specter Litt and as such, this request needs to be executed immediately, please cease and intercept ALL communications, no exceptions._**

 ** _Harvey._**

* * *

She immediately presses send, smiling to herself when she receives an email back from Christina, merely minutes later.

Clearly, she portrays a believable Harvey; straight to the point, extremely businesslike.

Paula's relieved to discover that his new secretary was not only none the wiser, but completely unaware of Harvey and Donna's history and obviously desperate to make a good impression on her new employer.

* * *

 ** _Yes sir, understood._**

 ** _All communications to you will be intercepted immediately and I will not broach the subject, regardless of circumstances._**

 ** _I have taken the liberty of having Adam, from IT personnel, block any incoming calls to your cell and any emails to the firm, from Ms Paulsen, effective immediately; and I will intercept any calls to your office, myself._**

 ** _Adam is aware of the urgency and sensitivity of the matter and that it requires the highest level of discretion._**

 ** _Christina_**

* * *

She smirks, almost wickedly, as she deletes the trail of evidence, before Harvey can notice.

This is what you get for being unfaithful, she thinks to herself.

"Thanks, Harvey!" She calls out.

"You owe me!" He smiles, attempting a joke as he returns from the bathroom.

Paula smiles innocently, turning to walk back towards front the door.

You better believe I do, she thinks to herself.

* END OF FLASHBACK *

* * *

 ** _Yes, I made Paula the villain! Sorry to those of you who like her, but I really can't stand her character! Hope you enjoyed this flashback chapter, stay tuned to see who is reunited in chapter four._**

 ** _As always, reviews are appreciated x_**


	4. Chapter 4

"Where the hell have you been?" Harvey asks, as Mike walks in to his office.

"I told you Rachel and I had a meeting with the wedding planner." Mike answers, sitting down in the chair in front of Harvey's desk.

"I didn't think it would take so long."

"Well, it did. Listen, Harvey, I have to tell you som…"

"I've had to re-schedule your meeting with Dominic Barone, I need you to come with me to Titan, the board has called an emergency meeting at 5 and Paul Sutherland needs us both there."

"Of course, but Harvey I need to tell you something…"

"Mike, I know I'm your best man, but I really don't have time for an update on wedding plans, as thrilling as that sounds." Harvey says, sarcastically.

"Donna's back." Mike blurts out.

"What?"

"Rachel and I saw her this afternoon, only briefly, as she was getting in a cab. But, it was definitely her."

"Good for her." Harvey says, a coldness to his tone.

"Harvey…"

"She left, Mike." Harvey cuts him off.

"Look, I don't know exactly what happened between the two of you back then that caused her to leave, but I do remember you telling me once that you chose to put her first, Harvey. You made the choice to let her go."

"I gave her the space I thought she needed and what'd I get in return? she went and changed her number and cut all ties with me completely."

"Harvey…"

"That was the choice she made, Mike. I was prepared to give her some space and prove to her that I could put her needs above my own …But she cut me out …she cut all of us out!"

"But if she's back sh…" Mike begins.

"She made her choice and I made mine, Mike. Now, last I checked you were a lawyer and not a fifteen-year-old girl, so rather than filling me in on the latest gossip, why don't you get the hell out of my office and go do your god damn job?!" Harvey says coldly.

* * *

"How did it go?" Rachel asks, as Mike walks in to her office.

"You know that scene in the Day of the Dead, when Torrez gets his head ripped off?" Mike says.

"That bad, huh?"

"He shut down the second I mentioned her."

"So, what happens now?" Rachel asks.

"Nothing. What can we do?" Mike asks.

"Mike…"

"She left us too, Rach. I hate to say it, but I can understand why he's so angry. We're family and she just…"

"Mike, it's Donna, we know her. I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt and at least give her the chance to explain." She insists.

"It's been four years babe, I don't think she just went out for some milk." He attempts to joke.

"I know her, Mike. I'm choosing to believe that she had a valid reason; she wouldn't have just disappeared and only left a vague letter behind if she didn't. All I know, is that she kissed Harvey, things were tense around here for weeks after and then suddenly she was gone …What if he did something?"

"But, she's back now. She's back and she still hasn't got in touch with any of us." Mike argues tactfully.

Rachel sighs, "I can't explain it, I just have a gut feeling about this. I just need to figure out how to get in touch with her."

"You're a good friend." Mike smiles, admiring his fiancées loyalty.

"So is she."

* * *

"What is this place, Momma?" Hope asks, looking up at the building in front of them.

"This is where I used to live when I lived in New York before you were born." Donna explains.

"It's tall!" Hope says, craning her neck back to look up at the building.

"It is." Donna agrees, admiring her daughter's cuteness.

"Can we go inside?" the young girl asks.

"Actually, honey, other people live in there now." Donna explains. "It's still mine, but they pay Momma money to live there while I'm not using it."

"Oh" Hope says, satisfied with the explanation. "Can we get ice-cream?"

Donna laughs at how easily Hope changes the subject.

"Maybe after dinner, if you're lucky." She says.

"Donna?" A familiar voice calls out from behind them.

"Rachel." Donna says, stunned, turning around and setting eyes on the familiar brunette.

"Hi"

"Hi. Wha – What are you doing here?"

"Looking for you, actually." Rachel says.

"But, how did you?" Donna begins.

"…I didn't. I just saw you earlier today and didn't know how to reach you, so I was just going to give your tenants this letter and hope they could get it to you." She explains, motioning to the paper in her hand.

"Oh." Donna says, taken aback by the run in, "It …It's really nice to see you Rach."

"You too." Rachel says, stepping forward to give her a hug.

"And who is this?" Rachel asks, looking down at Hope.

"This …This is my daughter." Donna explains.

"I'm Hope." The little girl grins.

"Hi Hope, I'm Rachel." She says, leaning down and holding out her hand to shake. "It is very nice to meet you."

"You're pretty." Hope says matter of factly.

"Well, thank you," Rachel smiles "So are you!"

"I like you. You can be my friend." Hope says, inciting a broad smile from Rachel, flashing back to a similar conversation with her Mother years ago.

 _ **"**_ _ **You're weird. We'll be friends."**_

"I'm glad." Rachel smiles, straightening up.

"…Do you want to grab a coffee?" Rachel offers.

As much as her instinct screams at her to leave, Donna fights the urge.

The fact is she has missed her friend.

"Sure." She agrees.

* * *

"Wow, so you and Mark got back together? Rachel asks.

"For a while, just over two years, but it didn't work out. We're still friends though, and he's so great with her." Donna says, nodding towards Hope, who was sitting next to them in the booth, preoccupied with coloring in.

"So, she's three? you must have fallen pregnant right after you left?" Rachel says, "…I'm really happy for you, Donna, I always knew you'd make a great Mom."

"Thanks Rach." She smiles.

"She's so beautiful." Rachel says, looking at the girl.

"Yeah …I kinda like her." Donna grins, looking over at her mini-me, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

They sit in silence for a moment, Donna taking a deep breath in, before looking away slightly awkwardly.

"This feels weird." Rachel says.

Donna breathes a sigh of relief, "Oh good, it's not just me."

Rachel chuckles, "No, it's not; I guess we're out of practice."

"Yeah."

Rachel looks over at Hope, before she decides to speak again, "Why did you leave, Donna?"

"I …It's just something I had to do." She says softly.

"What happened with Harvey?" Rachel continues.

"Rach…"

"No. Don't 'Rach' me, Donna. What happened?"

"It was a long time ago Rachel."

"Yeah. I know!" Rachel says, "It's the amount of time I've spent without my best friend."

"Rach."

"I understand whatever happened with you and Harvey upset you and you felt like you had to go, I remember how crushed you were. What I don't get, is how you could leave the rest of us?"

'I …I tried to…" Donna begins.

"…You changed your number, you don't stay in touch and now you show up four years later with this whole other life."

"I tried to stay in touch, Rach I emailed you when I got settled."

"What?" Rachel asks.

"I was really mad before I left, and I … I threw my phone in the Hudson. But, when I got to Chicago I emailed you to tell you, but then I never heard back."

Rachel's brows furrow as she processes the information she just received.

"I didn't know your number off by heart, but I remembered your email address, so I emailed you. I kept trying, but I never heard back, I figured you were mad at me and just didn't want to…"

"I never got any emails, Donna." Rachel says.

"Rachel, I must have sent more than twenty emails and got nothing back. Ever."

"Why didn't you just call me at the firm?" Rachel asks, confused.

Donna takes a deep breath, "When I found out I was …I-I tried to call the firm, I actually called to try and speak with Harvey, but he never got back to me. I lost count of the amount of times I tried, the number of messages I left with his secretary …that all went unanswered." She explains.

"I guess I just assumed you all felt the same, that you were all mad at me for leaving."

"Donna, I would never …I thought you didn't want to talk to me, I thought that somehow, whatever happened between you and Harvey, meant that you didn't..."

"Why would I name my daughter after someone I didn't want in my life?" Donna says softly.

"W-What?" Rachel stutters.

"Her middle name is Rachel." Donna smiles.

"Really?" Rachels whispers, automatically tearing up at the sweet sentiment.

"Really. Rach, you're my best friend, we may have been apart the last few years, but there is not a day that has gone by, that I didn't think of you …That I didn't miss you."

"Oh my God" Rachel whispers, wiping a tear that had fallen down her cheek.

"I missed you too, Donna."

"Come here" Donna offers, standing to give her a hug, a hug Rachel eagerly accepts.

"Why are you crying?" Hope asks, looking up at the pair.

"Oh," Donna starts, wiping away her own tears, "Honey, do you remember how we talked about sad tears and happy tears?" Donna asks, Hope nods her head in response, "Well, these are really happy tears." Donna explains.

"We've just really missed each other." Rachel adds.

"I'm really glad we ran in to each other, Rach."

"Me too." She agrees, sitting down again.

A little over half an hour later Rachel realises what the time is, the two women getting easily swept up in conversation, like no time had passed at all.

"God, Donna, I have so many questions and I haven't even asked what you're doing back here, but I really need to go, we're having dinner at my parent's house."

"It's fine, go." Donna dismisses "…We can catch up again, here, give me your cell.

Rachel hands over the device, watching as Donna taps away on the screen.

"Here, is my number, call me any time, we're here indefinitely and staying at my Dad's."

Rachel gives Donna a puzzled look "…That's a whole other story." She explains, standing to bid her farewell.

"Well maybe you can share it with Mike and I over dinner? I know he'd love to see you, and he's going to love Hope. Please, Donna, you have to come!" Rachel begs.

"I'd love to." She agrees.

"God, it has been so good to see you!" Rachel says, hugging her tightly.

"I didn't realise how much I'd missed this."

"Me either."

"Bye, Hope, I hope I get to see you again soon." Rachel smiles. "…and I'm glad I got to make a new friend."

"Me too." Hope smiles.

"I'll see you both soon."

"Bye Rach." Donna smiles, leaning down to pick up her daughter as the young girl waves sweetly at the departing woman.

* * *

Harvey watches the night lights streaming past, as he stares out the window of the moving car.

She's back. Donna's back.

His heart had done a 180 when he heard the words come out of Mike's mouth.

Now what?

He is angry, so angry, all he can think is how could she cut me out, after all we've been through?

He hates the uneasy feeling of not having any control. It's bullshit. This whole thing is such bullshit.

It's bullshit that she left.

It's bullshit that she's back.

And it's bullshit that even after all this time, he still misses her.

A million thoughts about her run through his mind as he spots a familiar building. He instructs Ray to pull over, insistent that he'll walk the rest of the way home.

May as well grab something to eat, he reasons, ignoring the significance of the venue, to him, to them.

* * *

 _ **"**_ _ **I don't wanna lose you."**_

 _ **"**_ _ **Because I hadn't thought about taking another job before, and when I did, I thought about who I wanted to take it with."**_

 _ **"…**_ _ **I don't wanna find out what kind of lawyer I'd be, without you."**_

* * *

Briefly looking inside the window of the familiar diner, he's not looking as he opens the glass door in front of him, almost colliding with the people exiting.

"Come on, Momma, after dinner we can have ice-cream!" She says vehemently, pulling her Mothers hand eagerly, as she heads out the door, not noticing the man in the doorway as her Mother pulls her back to avoid a collision.

"Sorry!" She immediately apologises, "She wasn't watching where she was…" She begins, rendered speechless mid-sentence by the sight in front of her.

"Donna." He whispers.

"Harvey."

Bullshit.

* * *

 ** _Dun - dun - dun! How do you think their reunion will go?_**

 ** _Let me know what you think._**


	5. Chapter 5

_**Thank you to all those who have left me a review, appreciate you taking the time to do so! x**_

* * *

"Sounds like she's a little spitfire, just like her Mom." Mike jokes, refilling their wine glasses.

"Oh, you have no idea." Donna laughs, "You know how they say when you have kids you just end up arguing with a miniature, more stubborn version of yourself? That's totally true!"

Donna was sitting with Mike and Rachel, in their apartment, after enjoying a dinner together that Rachel had prepared. After hours of catching up on the last few years, they were now on their fourth bottle of wine and enjoying the opportunity to reconnect after so many years apart.

The conversation had been natural, easy, still reminiscent of their closeness, despite their time apart, however, no one had dared mention the elephant in the room.

Harvey.

"I'm sure that stubbornness is from Mark though, right?" Mike jests, "No-one would ever describe you as stubborn, Donna."

"Ha. Ha." She jokes, ignoring the assumption, "…So funny."

Mike and Rachel had assumed that Mark was Hope's Father and Donna hadn't worked out how exactly to broach the subject without revealing who her Father actually is. It's not something she could do without talking to Harvey about it first.

"Is she with him now?"

"No, actually, she's with my Dad, He's enjoying the opportunity to have some alone time with her." she says, a hint of sadness to her voice.

"I really am so sorry to hear about your Dad, Donna." Mike offers, placing his hand on top of hers to offer some comfort. "If there is anything we can do…"

"Thanks, Mike, I appreciate it." Donna says.

After a long pause Mike takes a deep breath, "Look, Donna, I don't know if this question is allowed" He begins hesitantly, "…but, are you planning on going to see Harvey?"

Realisation suddenly hits her like a ton of bricks; he hadn't told them he'd seen her.

He hasn't told them, she thinks to herself, her mind flashing back to their run in at the diner two days ago.

* * *

 ***FLASHBACK***

"Donna"

"Harvey"

"Hi"

"Hi" he repeats awkwardly. "How are y…" He begins.

"Momma, come on!" Hope urges, pulling her hand, "ice-cream!" She adds excitedly.

"Momma? …You're a Mom?" He asks.

"Yeah, Harvey, I am." She answers.

He swears he can feel a piece of him dying in that moment; the only person he'd ever even imagined having children with, was Donna, and here she is, a Mother to someone else's child.

"…This is Hope."

Your daughter. _Our_ daughter, she thinks to herself.

"Hi" Harvey smiles gently.

"Hello" Hope smiles up at him.

The next words out of his mouth surprise even him.

For the last few years he'd imagined what he'd say if he ever saw her again…

Why did you leave me?

What did I do?

Why did you give up on me?

Do you ever miss me?

Why?

And yet all he could find the words to ask was, "Are you happy?"

The question takes Donna by surprise, her thoughts suddenly interrupted by the ringing of her cell.

"I, uh, sorry, just a second." She says, rummaging through her bag.

"Mark? Hi." She answers, smiling down at Hope as her daughter looks up at her. "Yeah, we're good! Yeah, she's here, hang on." Donna says, turning towards her daughter, kneeling down to pass her the phone.

Before he even realises it, he's shoving his hands in his pockets and walking away as fast as he can, without a word.

His head is spinning.

Mark.

She got back together with Mark.

She has a child with Mark.

He manages to turn the corner before Donna can even notice he's gone.

 ***END OF FLASHBACK***

* * *

"Probably not, Mike." Donna says, opting not to bring up the diner.

"Why not?" Mike probes.

"Mike!" Rachel warns.

"Sorry, I'm not trying to over-step, it's just, you guys were always so close, I don't get how you two are just not going to be in each other's lives anymore." Mike explains.

"That was a long time ago, things change, people change." Donna says, her voice laced with sadness, something that her friends pick up on, glancing briefly at each other.

"Who wants dessert?" Rachel asks, attempting to break the awkward silence.

"Actually, do you mind if I just make a quick call? I just want to check in on my Dad and Hope."

"Yeah, of course."

"Thanks." Donna says, excusing herself from the table to make the call outside, on the terrace.

"Something's not adding up." Mike says quietly, watching Donna through the glass door.

"Mike, it's none of our business." Rachel says, "Whatever happened between them, is between them."

"Yeah, I guess you're right." He replies, taking another sip of wine. "It's just…"

"I know." Rachel says softly, "It's Donna and Harvey."

Mike offers his fiancé a half smile, saying nothing else about it, still he can't ignore the feeling in the pit of his stomach, something about this whole situation just doesn't feel right.

* * *

"Hey Dad, just checking in, is everything ok?" Donna says.

"Hi honey, yeah we're all good. Hope's fast asleep and I'm just doing some reading before heading to bed myself." James explains.

"Was she any trouble?"

"None at all"

"She's a good girl, isn't she?" Donna smiles, thinking about her beautiful baby.

"She's the best; You've done such a wonderful job with her."

"Thanks Dad."

"Donna…"

"Yeah?"

"Is everything ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, it's just Mike was asking me about Harvey, and it's just hard to think about; I hate how much has changed." She explains.

"Have you spoken to him?"

Donna chuckles, "No, not since I yelled at him and told him to stay away from me."

* * *

 ***FLASHBACK***

"Ms Paulsen, you can't go in there!" Christina says, jumping up from her chair.

Donna ignores the woman, charging straight in to his office, on a mission.

"Why did you leave?!" she asks angrily.

Harvey looks up from the documents in his hands.

"I'm sorry, Mr Specter, she just barged in." Christina explains.

"It's ok, Christina, it's fine." Harvey says.

The blonde nods, backing out of the office, closing the door behind her, thoroughly confused about why he's ok with Donna being there.

"Why did you disappear?!" Donna demands, her eyes never leaving his.

"What?" He asks.

"From the diner, I turn for a second and you're just gone. What the hell Harvey?! After four years, you couldn't wait five seconds for me to finish a phone call?"

"I'm not doing this." He says, dropping the papers on his desk.

"I mean, I guess I shouldn't have been surprised, running away is what you're best at, right? God forbid you actually feel something!"

"Are you kidding me with this shit, Donna? …ME?! … _you_ left _me_ , you moved half way across the damn country, without a second thought, and I'm the one that runs away?!" he yells.

"And all for what?" He continues, "…Because you were in your mid thirties and afraid your biological clock was ticking. Of course, getting back with your ex makes perfect sense now, great reason to start a family, Donna; barren and desperate."

Donna feels as though the wind has been knocked out of her.

Asshole.

"You _arrogant_ son of a bitch!" Donna yells, "How _dare_ you!"

"…So why _are_ you back now, huh?" He interrupts "…after all this time? Let me guess, Mark wanted to move back?"

"You don't know what you're talking about, Harvey."

"Come on, what could possibly allow the mighty Donna Paulsen to grace us with her presence?"

"Just drop it, Harvey!" She warns.

"He buy you a house in the Hampdens? new job? yoga convention?" he says sarcastically. "Trying for another kid? Or maybe you just wanted to rub the one you have in my face."

"My Dad." She says, her eyes locked on his "…I came home because of my Dad."

"Ah, Good old Jim!" Harvey sneers, "…What? Pulled another shady scam that he needs you to bail him out of? Best of luck to him, because I sure as shit am not going to help him!"

"…He's dying, he has cancer and there is nothing more they can do." Donna explains seriously.

Fuck.

Donna's revelation hits him like a freight train; He's been a dick and he knows it.

Harvey's mouth drops, "Donna…"

"Don't." She says sternly. "I don't need your pity!"

"…You can say what you want about me, Harvey, I can take it. But don't you even think about saying _anything_ about my family!" She warns, "My Dad and my daughter are none of your concern, you pretentious asshole!"

"I-I'm sorry, Donna, I didn't mean any…"

"Stay the hell away from me!" She spits before turning and leaving abruptly.

"Fuck." Harvey sighs

 ***END OF FLASHBACK***

* * *

"Donna…"

"Yeah?" she says quietly.

"You need to talk to him." James says softly.

"Why, Dad? He made it perfectly clear how he feels, trust me! Give me one good reason why I should?" Donna says, thinking back to how cold he had been and the things he'd said.

"Well, the first reason is lying upstairs, asleep in her bed" James says gently. "…So, if not for you, do it for her."

"But he said…"

"We all say things we don't mean when we're angry, Donna." James interjects.

Donna can feel the burn as she tries to blink back the tears that threaten to fall.

"What's the second reason?" She asks quietly.

"You might be angry at him, honey, but I can see you still love him."

"Dad…" She whispers, shaking her head.

"Just talk to him, Donna." James encourages.

"And how would that go exactly, Dad? Hey, Harvey just so you know, despite everything you've said and done, I realised I might be stupid enough to actually still have feelings for you and oh, by the way, we share a three-year-old daughter?!"

"You what?" Mike chokes out, causing Donna to spin around at the sound of his voice behind her.

"Hope is Harvey's daughter?!"

* * *

 _ **Let me know your thoughts! x**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**Thank you to my reviewer's! It's your lucky day, your reviews inspired me to write the next chapter.**_

 _ **Enjoy! x**_

* * *

"You what?" Mike chokes out, causing Donna to spin around at the sound of his voice behind her.

"Hope is Harvey's daughter?!" Mike asks, completely taken aback by what he had just heard come out of the redhead's mouth.

Mike is standing in the doorway, clutching one of Rachel's jackets, seemingly ready to give it to her, because there was a cool breeze.

"Dad, I'll call you back." Donna says, ending the call abruptly. "Mike…"

"It's a simple question, Donna, is Hope Harvey's daughter?" Mike asks again.

"Yes." Donna admits softly. "She's Harvey's"

"I don't believe this" Mike says, shaking his head as he walks back inside.

"Mike, wait." Donna says, trailing close behind.

"How could you do that? How could you keep the fact that he has a daughter from him?!' Mike says, his voice reaching an octave higher as he finds himself getting angry.

How could she do this?

"Mike…"

"What's going on?" Rachel asks, coming from the kitchen as she hears the commotion.

"Oh nothing." Mike says sarcastically, "Just Donna's daughter is Harvey's daughter and she didn't feel the need to tell him."

"What?!" Rachel asks, shocked, surely she just misheard that. "Donna…"

"It's not that simple, Mike."

"It is that simple, it's literally _that_ simple, three words, Donna. Hope. Is. Yours. You couldn't manage three words in four years?! What the fuck?!"

"Mike!" Rachel berates.

"I TRIED!" Donna yells, desperately. "For over a year, I tried. Every call I made, every email I sent went unanswered. I was pregnant, I tried to tell him, but he cut me out of his life!"

"Donna…"

"Do you really think I would want my Daughter to grow up without a Father?!" She yells as the tears form in her eyes. "It kills me. Every day, it kills me! But I didn't make that choice, Mike, he did!"

"That doesn't make any sense." Mike says, softening as he sees the heartbreak in her face.

He knows she's telling the truth.

"No shit, Mike! Welcome to my world!" She laughs, "We slept together again and when I woke up thinking maybe we had a chance to be happy together, he was gone. He just left me, without so much as a goodbye!"

Donna takes a deep breath, attempting to calm her emotional state.

"He left me and not only that, he lied to me! That night he told me he had broken up with Paula, but when I went to his house to find out why the hell he left, I sure as hell got my answer when she opened the door!"

"But Harvey hates infidelity…" Mike says.

"I know, Mike! At least I thought I did, but when I saw her there it crushed me, it broke my heart."

She sniffs, wiping a stray tear away.

"So, I left." She shrugs, "I went ahead with my move and I made the choice to not let him hurt me again. A few hours before I flew out he had tried to call me, but I was so angry that I threw my cell in the river, I couldn't even begin to find the words to talk to him."

"Donna, I'm…"

"…When I found out I was pregnant, I called him straight away, I couldn't get thorough on his cell and I just figured he had changed his number, so then I tried the office and I lost count of the amount of times I left messages with his secretary, emails, you name it, nothing." She continues.

"So, eventually I gave up, I tried, and I tried but I couldn't do it anymore, my daughter became my number one priority."

"Why did you say Mark was the Father?" Mike asks, his tone soft again.

"I didn't, you assumed, and I just didn't correct you." She says meekly.

"Donna…He has to know."

"He doesn't want to know." She counters.

"You can't possibly know that!" Mike defends, "I don't know why he didn't respond, and yes that was wrong, but Harvey would want to know he has a child. What are you going to do if you see him?!"

"I have." Donna says.

"What?" Mike asks.

"I have seen him; twice."

"He didn't say anything…" Mike says, genuinely confused.

"And you're surprised by this?!" Donna scoffs, "Mr, 'I keep business here and personal here'!" She says, motioning with her hands.

"I can't believe he didn't say anything."

"I can." Rachel says, "Harvey has the emotional maturity of a potato, especially when it comes to being honest about his feelings for Donna."

Donna can't help but laugh at the comparison.

"I'm going to tell him, I swear. It's just when I saw him, we got in to this big fight, he also assumed Hope was Mark's …and he said some really hurtful things and I just…"

"It's ok, Donna." Mike says, stepping forward to giver her a hug, "I understand. It's ok."

"I'm so scared." Donna sniffs.

"It's going to be ok."

"We're here for you" Rachel adds, caressing Donna's arm.

"I just can't believe he didn't answer you and that he said nothing …about any of it." Mike says, still reeling from the information overload.

"Where does Mark fit in with all of this?" Rachel asks, tentatively.

"Mark and I got back together after I left, I didn't find out I was pregnant until I was four and a half months along and by then we'd been back together for a good few months." Donna explains.

"I told him the baby was Harvey's and I told him that I was trying to contact him, but he didn't care. He knew I needed help and he stepped up, even after we broke up! We managed to stay friends and he's been such a good Father figure for her."

"So, she thinks he's her Dad?" Mike asks.

"No. She knows he's not her Dad, he's like an Uncle. But their bond is really sweet; she loves him, and he loves her too. He's been there for both of us."

"It's just so unlike Harvey," Mike shakes his head, "And to say nothing."

"Yeah, well, I spent a long time thinking the same thing, but eventually I had to move on with my life. And considering he hasn't even told you that he's seen me, apparently not much has changed."

"I'm sorry, Donna." Rachel says, offering her a half smile. "That must have been so hard for you."

"It's ok, Rach; I'm stronger for it and I have a beautiful little girl because of it, so I don't regret anything."

"What are you going to do?" Mike asks.

"I'm going to talk to Harvey and tell him. When, I don't know, but I've never not wanted him to know …I just…"

"…Couldn't keep being ignored." Rachel finishes.

"Yeah."

"Donna, I'm sorry, I had no idea you…" Mike starts.

"Its ok, Mike, really, I know your heart was in the right place …and I will tell him, I swear, I just need to find the right time." She explains.

"I can talk to him if you want?" He offers.

"No, its ok, this is something I have to do." She says.

Mike can only nod in agreement.

"I should go …Thank you so much for dinner, it was lovely, but please…"

"We won't say anything." Rachel promises.

"And we're here for anything you need." Mike adds.

"Thanks guys.

* * *

After such an emotional night, Donna was ready for bed, she was mentally and emotionally drained. As the cab approaches her Father's place, she notices a figure sitting on the steps, they come to a stop outside the townhouse and Donna recognizes who it is instantly.

Harvey.

She passes the driver a few bills, telling him to keep the change before exiting the car.

"Harvey, I've had a long night, I'm really not in the mood for…"

"I'm sorry." He says, interrupting her before she can finish her sentence. "I was a jerk and I never should have said what I said; You didn't deserve that."

Donna swallows, taken aback by the unexpected apology.

"How did you find me?" She queries.

"I went to your apartment and your tenant explained that you've rented your place out. After you mentioned your Father, I figured I'd either find you here or maybe he could tell me where I could find you…" He explains. "…I just wanted to apologize, I never should have said those things."

"You remembered where my Father lives?"

"I remember everything about you, Donna, you were by my side for a long time." He says.

"Thank you, Harvey, I appreciate the apology."

"I should go." He says, nodding towards his black Lexus before rubbing the back of his neck. "Have a good night, Donna."

"Have a good night, Harvey."

He offers her a small, awkward smile as he moves to head towards the vehicle.

Donna closes her eyes and takes a deep breath as he walks past her.

"Harvey…"

"Yeah?"

"Do you want to come inside?"

* * *

"Penny for your thoughts?" Mike asks as he climbs in to bed besides Rachel.

"It's nothing I just…" She starts.

"What?" He prods.

"Something doesn't feel right, Mike."

"What do you mean?" He asks.

"Donna…" She answers, "…She said Harvey never answered her, she tried contacting him, but he never responded and eventually she gave up…"

"Yeah" Mike agrees, "…That sounded strange to me too, but then again he also never mentioned that he's seen her twice since she's been back either."

"…It's just that when I had lunch with her she said the same thing about me. I asked her why she hadn't stayed in contact and she said she had tried."

"You think she's lying?" Mike asks.

"No." Rachels says quickly. "Definitely not, I can tell she's telling the truth, it's just ...weird, why did you, or I not get _any_ of her emails? The phone numbers I can understand, she tossed her phone and had to get a new one, but all of our email addresses are the exact same ones from when Donna was at the firm."

"…So, if we didn't get any correspondence from her, maybe Harvey didn't either." Mike finishes.

"I think we need to speak to Benjamin."

* * *

"…He was having treatment three times a week but when they realised the tumour had grown and the position it was in, they knew there wasn't anything else we could do. So, now he just takes these pills three times a day and that seems to be working, at least for now it is, but we know it's not a long-term cure." She explains sombrely.

"Shit." Harvey breathes out. "I'm so sorry."

"Thanks."

"How long are you planning on staying?" Harvey asks cautiously, choosing his words carefully, lest he insult her again.

"Indefinitely." She says, pouring them both another glass of wine. "I just wanted to be with Dad; I wanted Hope to spend more time with him too."

"Donna, about what I said…"

"It's fine Harvey, I know you've never had the best relationship with him."

"No, I haven't, but that doesn't give me the right to stay stuff like that. I'm really sorry for being so rude to you, I shouldn't have belittled your relationship or mentioned your family, no matter how angry I was."

"Mark and I aren't together, Harvey, not anymore, we're just friends."

The moment the words leave her mouth, Harvey feels butterflies instantly in the pit of his stomach.

They're not together.

"…But I appreciate the apology."

Harvey takes a deep breath, willing himself to ask the question he'd been wondering for the past four years.

"Donna, why did you cut me out?" He says, finally mustering up the courage to ask.

"Wh-What?" Donna says, completely taken aback by the question.

He's kidding, right? She thinks to herself.

"Momma?"

They turn to find a sleepy hope standing in the doorway, clutching her teddy bear.

"Hey baby," Donna says warmly, "What are you doing awake?"

"I had a bad dream." She says.

"Oh yeah? What about?" Donna asks.

"Grandpa." Hope says. "I want him to be better, Momma."

Donna breathes in through her nose, biting her lip to stop it quivering.

"I know baby, me too." She says, kissing Hope's forehead as she climbs on to the couch between them, as though it's the most natural thing in the world.

"Do you remember my … _friend_ , Harvey" Donna asks, hesitating on the word friend.

Hope nods, "I met you when we went to get ice-cream."

"It's nice to see you again, Hope." Harvey smiles down at her.

"Are you a prince?" Hope asks seriously.

"What?" Donna laughs, Harvey chuckles at the adorable girl's bluntness also.

"In my book Prince Eric is dressed fancy like you." She says, pointing towards his suit.

"As in The Little Mermaid's Prince Eric?" Donna queries.

Hope nods enthusiastically. "And you look like Ariel, Momma, can you grow a mermaid's tail?"

"Ok, that's enough of that book for a while, I think!" Donna laughs.

"Aww," Hope whines "But it's my favwite."

"Mine too." Harvey adds, taking Donna by surprise.

"Really?" Hope says excitedly, "You like The Little Mermaid? …So can you read it to me?"

"Sure." He agrees.

"Harvey, you don't have to…"

"It's fine", he interjects, "Last time I saw Marcus his daughter made me watch that movie like 50 times in a row." He chuckles at the memory.

"Besides, I have a thing for hot redheads" He adds cheekily, causing Donna's eyes to instantly meet his gaze.

"Maybe another time," Donna says, brushing a strand of long hair off of Hope's face, as she attempts to rid the image of Harvey curled up on a bed with their daughter, reading, rom her mind. "It's already late and it is _way_ past your bedtime." She says, poking Hope playfully as she says it.

"But Grandpa lets me stay up!" Hope argues.

"Well unlucky for you, missy, I am not Grandpa, I am your Mom and I said back to bed …quick!" She says, tickling Hope's sides playfully. "Now, say goodnight, and back to bed!" She instructs.

"Goodnight, Harvey." Hope smiles, giving him a big smile and a small hug,

"Goodnight." He smiles, hugging her back.

Hope jumps off the couch, turning to hug her Mom.

"I love you." Donna smiles.

"Love you too, Momma." Hope says, as she pulls away, heading back to her room.

She pauses at the doorway looking back at her Mom with a cheeky, familiar, Cheshire cat like grin.

"Uncle Mark lets me stay up too!" She adds before running off, the sound of her giggles trailing off with her footsteps.

Donna shakes her head at the girl's cheekiness, before noticing Harvey's brows furrowing slightly.

"What is it?" Donna asks.

" _Uncle_ Mark?" Harvey says, "…I, I thought Mark was her Dad?"

Donna shakes her head, "No, just a pretty great Uncle."

"Are you still with her Father?"

"No." Donna says, almost sadly, the change in her demeanour something Harvey instantly notices. "He hasn't been in her life."

"Donna…"

It's now or never.

"She's yours, Harvey. Hope is your daughter."

* * *

 _ **He know's! What do you think? How do you think he will react? x**_


	7. Chapter 7

"Benjamin, do you have a second?" Mike asks, knocking on the glass wall of his office.

"I hopefully have multiple millions of seconds, Michael." Benjamin says, referring literally to the seconds remaining in his life, in the straight-laced way he always does.

"Benjamin, I recently found out that I didn't receive a number of emails from a friend and I think its happened to more than one person at the firm. I'm hoping you might be able to help us figure out why." Rachel explains.

"Of course," Benjamin says, "Who else experienced these issues?"

"Harvey for one and possibly myself and Louis" Mike answers.

"Okay, just give me a second." Benjamin says, typing away quickly on his keyboard.

"Do you have the email addresses?"

"It's just one, Donna Paulsen's." Rachel explains.

"Donna's no longer employed at Specter Litt," Benjamin says, "I deleted her details off our server myself when she left, so her firm email would have been deactivated immediately."

"These were from her personal email though, over the span of quite a few months." Rachel explains.

"That I can't explain" Benjamin says, his brows furrowing as he types away furiously again.

"I think I found the problem." He says hesitantly, confusion etched on his face.

"It seems Donna's details have been permanently blocked from our server"

"What does that mean?" Mike asks, confused.

"It means that every email sent from that address would not have been delivered to and Specter Litt employees." Benjamin answers.

"Can you see who blocked it?"

"Just a second…" He says, typing away again. "It seems it was Adam."

"Under who's instruction?" Rachels asks.

Benjamin picks up the phone, dialling Adam's extension immediately.

"Adam, could you please explain why there is a block on Donna Paulsen's details on the server?"

"Uh-huh …Yeah …really?" He says, "Okay, thank you, Adam." He says, hanging up.

"It seems it was Harvey who requested it." Benjamin says.

* * *

Harvey sits on the desk chair in his office, facing the window and staring out across the New York skyline. His mind automatically replaying the events of the previous night...

* * *

 ***FLASHBACK***

"She's yours, Harvey. Hope is your daughter."

Harvey grins instantly. "Ha. Ha. Donna" He says, "I'm serious though, why doesn't she see her Father? Did he do something to you?" He asks, assuming Donna is only kidding.

"Harvey…" She says timidly.

"What?" He asks softly.

"I'm not joking. Hope is your daughter, _our_ daughter."

"Donna, that's not funny," He says, "I'm trying to be serious."

Donna looks away from him, feeling the familiar sting of tears forming.

"Donna…" He says, his hand touching hers, causing her to look up at him.

He realises instantly that she's not joking, a sick feeling forms in the pit of his stomach and he can feel the blood drain from his face.

A daughter, with Donna, a three year old child.

Three years.

"You're not kidding…" He says, more of a statement than a question.

"No …I'm not." She says softly.

Harvey swallows as he finds him himself literally lost for words.

"Harvey say something…" Donna says, his silence scaring her.

"How could you keep this from me?" He asks, shell-shocked, still trying to process the information he was just given.

"I have a daughter and you didn't see fit to tell me?!" He says, jumping up suddenly.

"Harvey…"

"I don't believe you; this is the worst thing anyone has _ever_ done to me; How could you?!"

"Me?!" She asks, springing to her feet.

"YES!" He roars, "How could you keep the fact that I have a child from me?!"

"You cut me out, Harvey! How could I…"

"ME?!" He yells, "Are you fucking kidding me?!"

" _YOU_ moved away, Donna, " _YOU_ changed your number and _YOU_ are the one who has lied to me this whole time and kept me away from a child I didn't even know I had!"

"Harvey, I tried to…"

"You tried?!" He spits, "clearly not enough, there is no excuse for this!"

"I didn't lie to you, I swear I…"

"…A lie of omission is still a lie, Donna." He interjects.

"Harvey…" She cries.

"I can't even look at you right now!" He says, heading for the door.

"Harvey, wait!" She begs, grabbing his arm in an attempt to stop him.

"Get your God damn hands off me!" He yells, yanking his arm away from her.

"…Mark my words, Donna, I will _never_ forgive you for this!" He says angrily before storming out of the room.

Donna can't help but collapse in to sobs on the couch, hearing the front door slam as he exits.

"Donna? Honey?" Jim says, walking in to the room clad in his pajamas and robe, having been woken up by the ruckus.

"I told him." She sobs.

Jim immediately pulls Donna in for a hug, holding her as she cries.

"It's ok, sweetie, I'm here." He says softly, rubbing her back in an effort to calm her

"He hates me, Dad."

 ***END OF FLASHBACK***

* * *

He has a child, _they_ have a child.

A beautiful little girl; A little girl who has no idea who he really is.

A barrage of questions have been going through his head since last night, he's just not certain he wants to hear the answers.

How the hell could she do this? He thinks to himself.

Donna, of all people.

"Harvey, I need to ask you something." Mike says, walking in to his office.

Harvey just continues staring out in to the distance.

"Harvey?"

Nothing.

"Harvey!" Mike says louder.

"What?" Harvey says, jolting from his thoughts.

"Where were you just then?" Mike asks, referring to Harvey's dazed response.

"I'm not in the mood, Mike, let it go." Harvey snaps.

"Why didn't you tell me you'd seen Donna?" Mike asks.

"Excuse me?"

"You've seen Donna twice and said nothing?" Mike continues.

"Last I checked, Mike, I'm a God damn grown man, not a five-year-old! I can do whatever the hell I want with my time and don't need a lecture from you about how I spend it or who I do or don't spend it with!" Harvey snaps.

"What the hell's up your ass?!" Mike says, unappreciative of Harvey's tone.

"Nothing."

"Sure seems like nothing" Mike mumbles under his breath.

"Got something you want to say, Mike?" Harvey goads.

"Yeah, actually, I do. You're an asshole for making me think that Donna cut you out, when really it was the other way around!"

"What the hell are you talking about?!" Harvey retorts, already tiring of Mike's attitude.

"You blocked all communication from her and then made it out like she cut you out."

"She did cut me out, Mike!" Harvey yells, "…and I still don't know what the fuck you're talking about!"

"Bullshit!"

"It's not bullshit!" Harvey snaps, "but if you don't believe me, there's the door, Mike. You can kiss my ass, I don't need this shit …Not today!"

"Harvey…"

"Just go, Mike."

"Harvey, did you or did you not have Donna's email blocked from the firm?"

"What?" Harvey says, thoroughly confused as to what the hell Mike's talking about, "I barely know how to dial out, how the hell would I do that?!"

"Harvey, Donna's email was bl…"

"I don't have time for this!" Harvey interjects, "I have a meeting in an hour that I have to get ready for and I really don't have time to worry about what else Donna has done."

"What do you mean what else?" Mike asks. "What did she do?"

"She lied to me."

"Okay…"

"Hope is my daughter, Mike." Harvey says, his voice sounding almost defeated, "we have a child and she kept it from me.

"Harvey…"

Harvey notices the lack of surprise etched on Mike's face.

"Holy shit." Harvey says, realisation setting in, "You knew…"

"Mr Specter, can I talk to you for a moment?" Christina asks, as she stands in the doorway, having heard the bulk of their conversation.

"You knew." Harvey repeats, making his way towards Mike. "You knew Hope was mine and you didn't say anything?! …I should lay you out right here!" He says angrily, grabbing Mike by the lapels of his suit jacket and throwing him against the desk.

"Harvey, stop" Mike says, attempting to loosen the older lawyers grip on him.

Mike is certain he's never seen Harvey this wild. Not with Tanner, not with Stephen…

"Harvey, stop!" Christina shouts as she sees Harvey clench his fist.

"It was me!" She yells, "I blocked her details, I screened her calls!"

Both men look in the young secretaries' direction, Harvey letting his grip on Mike go.

"What?" Harvey says.

"I was trying to tell you, before you went psycho you, Harvey, someone blocked Donna from the firm's system" Mike explains, straightening himself up. "….Every email she sent after she left was blocked and every call she made went unanswered. She did try to tell you…"

"You did that?" Harvey asks, his eyes narrowing as he glares at the blonde.

"Yes. Well, sort of…" Christina nervously responds, "I was just doing what you asked in your email" "What email?"

"The one after Donna resigned. You asked me to cease and block all communication with and from her, immediately and to not ask any questions."

"I didn't send you any email about that, Christina."

"I figured that, when I heard you two arguing" She says, "But I can show you it, if you don't believe me, it was from your direct email address."

"Show me." Harvey demands.

Christina walks over her to her desk, bending down in front of her computer to look for the information. It's easy to find, as she had flagged it as a reminder for herself, pressing print she retrieves the document from the printer, glancing at it quickly before having it snatched from her hands by Harvey.

Harvey skim reads the email and her subsequent reply, outlining her contact with Adam and how she had actioned the request.

"I didn't write this." Harvey says, "someone must have hacked my email."

"Benjamin ran a check, Harvey, it came from your cell" Mike explains.

"I _didn't_ write this!" Harvey repeats, through clenched teeth.

"I know, Harvey." Mike reassures him, "but someone did …from your phone."

"I'm sorry, Mr Specter, I thought I was following orders." Christina says, the guilt obvious in her face.

"Its okay," Mike answers, speaking for a still stunned Harvey, who was staring down at the paper in his hands. "You didn't know."

"She thought I was ignoring her" Harvey says in an almost whisper, "…that I didn't care."

"Harvey…" Mike begins.

"I have to go."

* * *

Donna sits on her bed, stunned by the information Rachel had just shared with her on the phone. She had explained what they had manage to discover, with Benjamin's help, and the reason all of her correspondence had been ignored since she left the firm.

It wasn't him.

He didn't ignore her. He didn't cut her out. He had no idea that she was pregnant, he had no idea that she had tried to contact him for over a year.

She was struggling to fathom who could possibly be that cruel when she is hit by a sickening feeling deep inside her; She runs for the bathroom, barely making it in time as she empties the entire contents of her stomach, in to the toilet bowl.

As she slumps back against the wall, she can feel her whole body trembling.

Four years.

Someone had cost them four years.

* * *

Donna brushes her teeth and makes her way downstairs.

I have to see him, she thinks to herself.

She gathers up her jacket and her keys and just as she's reaching for her purse she hears a knock at the front door. She drops the items she's holding and makes her way to the door. Whoever it is just going to have to wait, she thinks to herself, she needs to go see Harvey.

As she opens the door she finds her self face to face with the man himself, standing there with a solemn look on his face.

He doesn't look angry anymore, he looks sad, broken, gutted.

He knows.

They stand motionless for a few moments, looking intently at each other.

They both know.

Donna is the first to break, her face crumbling as reality sets in, all that they've gone through at the hands of someone else, suddenly too much to bare. Before she can even lift her arms to bury her face in her hands, she's being pulled flush against him, his strong arms enveloping her as he holds her comfortingly. It's in his arms that she finally loses it; gripping him tightly as she weeps for all that they've lost.

* * *

"I'm sorry for the way I spoke to you last night" Harvey says sincerely.

"It's ok, I get it." She says."…I guess we both should have had a little more faith in each other." She smiles sadly.

"Can I ask you something?" He asks.

Donna nods.

"Why did you think I wouldn't want to speak to you?"

"I just figured you'd changed your mind"

"About what?" He asks.

"Me." She says softly. "I thought maybe you felt guilty about cheating on Paula, knowing your history, or maybe lying to me about her."

"Donna, we slept together again after that night in the office and I've never lied to you about anything. You're the one person, besides my Dad, that I've always been completely honest with."

"I meant the second time" Donna adds meekly, "…And you told me you had broken up with her."

"I did!" Harvey says, turning to look at her. "Donna, I broke up with her the next morning after that night in the office."

"Then why when I came to your house was she there, waiting for you to go to brunch?" Donna asks.

"What? When?"

"The morning after the night at my place, the night Hope was conceived. When I woke up you were gone, and I wanted answers, but when I got to your apartment, she answered while you were in the shower and told me to stay the hell way from you before slamming the door in my face!"

"Donna, the only time I saw her was when she surprised me to return the key to my apartment."

"She was there, Harvey; I tried to apologize and…"

"Donna, I swear the only reason I left you that morning was because I was trying to respect your wishes. You said leaving was something you had to do, and I didn't want you to stay just because of me, you deserved to put yourself first." He says gently. "…But that doesn't mean is wasn't one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do."

"But she was there…"

"She was already there when I got home, Donna. She literally gave me my key, said goodbye and left, you must have come over before I'd even got home.

Donna sighs, shaking her head over how messy the situation had become.

"I can't believe what a mess this is." She sniffs. "Why would someone do this?!"

"Wait," Harvey says, recalling that morning in more detail, "Why did you apologize to Paula?"

"Because you were still with her the night we had sex in my office!" Donna says incredulously, surprised that the reason wasn't obvious to him.

Harvey swallows as realisation begins to sink in. "Donna, I never told Paula about that night."

"What?"

"I broke it off with her the next day, but I never mentioned we had been together." Harvey explains.

"…And I told her us sleeping together that night had been my fault…" Donna adds.

Holy shit.

Harvey remembers Paula's excuse about her phone dying and how he'd offered her his to check emails while he went to the bathroom.

"Fuck." He says, disbelievingly.

"What is it?" Donna asks.

"It was her." He explains.

"What was?"

"The email Christina got that was apparently from me …it was Paula!"

* * *

 ** _As always, please let me know your thoughts! x_**


	8. Chapter 8

_**Thank you so much for the reviews guys, it really inspires me to keep writing.**_

* * *

Harvey barges in to Paula's office, with only one outcome in mind, the door ricocheting off of the wall as it hits it at full force.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?! He roars.

"Harvey, what do you think you're doing?!" Paula demands, "We are in the middle of a session!"

"I DON'T GIVE A SHIT!"

"I am so sorry!" Paula says to her client.

"It-It's ok." The woman says, "I should go."

Paula watches her client leave before turning back to Harvey, enraged.

"How dare you! You have no right…" She yells.

"Cut the shit, Paula. I know what you did!" Harvey growls.

"And what is that, Harvey?" Paula asks, despite knowing exactly what he means.

"You made me think Donna had cut me out!"

Paula says nothing.

"You had my secretary block her and as a result, Donna has thought I have hated her for the past four years!"

"…And I'll bet for the past four years you have been better off without that woman in your life! She is toxic and your dependency on her has always been unhealthy!" Paula argues.

"How dare you!" Harvey spits.

"How dare you cheat on me!" She retorts, "…you made a fool of me, Harvey."

"You lied to me, you cheated on me and you made a fool of me!"

"And that gives you the right to fuck up my life?!" Harvey yells back.

"Like you fucked up mine?!" She laughs. "Pot, kettle, black!"

"You have no idea what you've cost me!"

"Get over yourself, Harvey!" Paula rolls her eyes, "…All I cost you was a toxic relationship, one that you are better off without anyway!"

"Says the therapist who had no problem fucking her patient!" Harvey counters.

"You arrogant son of a…" Paula starts

"YOU COST ME MY DAUGHTER!" Harvey shouts, cutting her off.

Paula is visibly taken aback, "What?"

"Your bullshit has cost me my relationship with my daughter …a daughter I knew nothing about!"

"You have a child?" Paula whispers, "…With Donna."

"And I didn't know …because of you; and from what I can see, you're not even the least bit sorry!"

"Harvey, had I known, I…"

"Let me be clear, Paula; the _only_ reason I'm not taking this further is because _I_ made a mistake." Harvey interjects, still seething, delivering the words through gritted teeth.

"When you cheated on me?" Paula asks.

"When I made the mistake of pursuing _you_ , to avoid how I really felt."

"Harvey. I don't…"

"You stay the fuck away from me, from Donna and from our daughter! you evil bitch, or so help me God, I won't be held responsible for my actions!" Harvey spits.

"Is that a threat?!" Paula asks, a shiver running through her at Harvey's icy tone.

"Your God damn right it is!" He says, exiting her office, slamming the door behind him.

* * *

"I'm coming!" Donna yells, heading toward the front door.

She opens it, finding Harvey waiting on the other side.

"Harvey …Hey."

"Hi." He smiles.

"Are you ok?" She asks cautiously.

"You mean besides the fact that I've lost my best friend and three years with my daughter?" He retorts.

"You lost Mike?" She jokes.

"Donna…"

"Come in, Harvey." She says, motioning for him to come inside.

"Where's Hope?" He asks as he walks in.

"Upstairs, playing in her room." Donna explains.

"…How did it go with Paula?"

"How'd you know I saw Paula?" He asks.

Donna cocks her head, giving him the 'I'm Donna' look.

"Doesn't take a genius, Harvey, you figured out it was her and practically ran out of the house! …Did she admit it?"

"Yeah …it was her."

"That bitch!" Donna says, sitting down on the couch. "How could she do that?!"

"…I don't give a shit about Paula, Donna, I said what I had to, to her."

"Harvey…"

"I want to spend time with her, Hope, I want to get to know her." Harvey says.

"I'd like that." She says, "Are you free today?"

"Today?" He repeats.

"Yeah. I was going to take her to the park, do you want to join us?"

"I'd love to."

* * *

"Momma, look at me!" Hope shouts, giggling as she rides ahead of them on her tricycle, her long strawberry blonde hair flowing in the wind as she picks up speed.

"Good job baby." Donna calls out, smiling as she watches her mini me.

It was a beautiful, sunny afternoon, and they had decided to make the most of the glorious weather and take a walk through Central Park. Donna and Harvey were walking behind as Hope rode along just ahead of them.

"She's gorgeous, Donna, you did good." Harvey says.

" _We_ did good, Harvey, I didn't make her myself." Donna says, bumping his shoulder, attempting a joke.

"Except you did." Harvey says, almost sadly, "…raising her at least."

"That's not your fault." Donna reassures him.

"I know, it's just…"

"I know."

"I don't know how to do this, Donna." He sighs, shaking his head.

"Do what?" She asks.

"This…" He says, motioning ahead to Hope, "Be a Dad."

"Harvey, do you think I knew what I was doing?" She asks, "I learned how to be a Mom …I'm _still_ learning, I don't have all the answers!"

"I have no idea where to even start, I can barely look after myself, let alone someone else." He says as they continue walking behind Hope.

"Well, just start with getting to know her." Donna suggests, "Spend some time with her."

"Are you going to tell her?" Harvey asks.

"Of course." She says, a little stunned by the question. "Harvey, you're her Father, she needs to know who you are."

"Does she?" He questions. "I'm not exactly Father of the year material."

"I don't think you're giving yourself enough credit; I know you'll be great."

"Says the woman who organised every aspect of my life for me, for fourteen years." He counters.

"…And in that time, I saw how caring you are, how much you love your family and how you would do anything you can to protect the people you love!" She argues.

"Donna…"

"Harvey!" She interrupts, "just take it one day at a time."

"Owww!" Hope wails.

Harvey and Donna look up to see their girl on the floor, with her bike over her leg, immediately rushing to her side.

"Are you okay, honey?" Donna asks, checking Hope over as Harvey lifts the bike off her.

"I hurt my leg." She cries, pointing to where it hurts.

Donna instantly picks her up, rubbing her back gently as she soothes her whimpers.

"Are you ok?" Harvey asks, brushing her hair off her face.

"Mhmm" Hope says, nodding quietly.

"You're a brave girl!" Harvey smiles, rubbing her arm gently.

"You want me to carry you?" Donna asks.

"Can Harvey?" Hope asks, looking up at him.

"Yeah, of course." Harvey says, moving to take her from her Mother, the little girl's arms outstretched towards him, an action that instantly melts his heart.

Donna smiles, reaching down for Hope's bike, watching as Hope snuggles against Harvey's chest, her Father's chest, her little arms struggling to fit around his broad shoulders as she holds on.

"What?" Harvey asks, noticing Donna's grin.

"Nothing. Just very …Paternal." She winks.

* * *

"Ok, just sit down in there and I'll get the first aid kit." Donna says, as soon as they get in the front door.

"Are you ok?" Harvey asks, sitting down on the couch, Hope settling on his lap like it's the most natural thing in the world.

"Yeah, I'm brave, remember?"

"I remember." He grins.

"Here we are." Donna says, returning to the room with the kit.

"…Now this might sting a little, baby" She says, before she starts dabbing antiseptic on the graze.

Hope flinches as it meets the cut, gripping Harvey's hand tighter.

"There, all done." Donna smiles, placing the band-aid over the area.

"Thank you, Mommy" Hope smiles.

"My brave girl." Donna smiles, kissing her forehead. "…Don't forget to thank Harvey, he's the one who carried you ten blocks"

"Thank you for carrying me home, Harvey."

"You're welcome." Harvey smiles.

"Honey, we need to talk to you about something, is that ok?" Donna asks.

Hope nods and Harvey's chest tightens as he realises what Donna is thinking.

"Do you remember after Taylor's birthday party, you asked me why she had a Mommy and a Daddy, and you didn't?"

Harvey's heart sinks at the revelation.

"Yeah." Hope answers, remembering the occasion.

"Do you remember what I said?"

"You said my Daddy lives very far away but he loves me."

 _Of course she did,_ Harvey thinks to himself, even when she thought I hated her, she was still advocating for me.

"That's right," Donna says, "But, the reason your Dad lived far away and didn't see you was because someone told him a lie, honey, someone told both of us a lie."

"It's not nice to lie." Hope says.

"No, it's not." Harvey agrees.

"But, now that we know the truth, I want to fix that for you; I want you to be able to spend lots of time with your Daddy, would you like that?"

Hope nods eagerly, "But, where is he?" She asks.

"He's here, Hope, Harvey is your Daddy."

Hope's eyebrows furrow as her little mind tries to process the information, looking between Harvey and Donna.

"I'm sorry I haven't been around, Hope, someone told me a lie and I only just found out. I didn't know, If I did, I would have been with you every day, I promise." Harvey offers.

"Are you ok honey?" Donna asks tentatively, worried about Hope's lack of response so far.

Hope nods again.

"How are you feeling, do you have any questions?"

"I feel sad, I'm sorry someone lied to you, Momma."

"Me too baby." Donna smiles, cupping Hope's cheek, her heart swelling with her daughter's kindness.

"You too, Harvey."

"I'm sorry too." He says, "Because I missed out on being with you since you were a little baby." He says sadly.

"But he's here now." Donna adds, her hand sliding over Harvey's and giving it a squeeze.

Hope looks up at Harvey, her mouth breaking in to a smile. "I'm glad you're my Daddy." She says, turning to hug him as tight as she can from her position on his lap.

The move surprises him, he takes a moment to register what's happening, before wrapping his arms around her in return.

"Me too." He smiles, breathing in the scent of her hair.

Donna's heart soars as she witnesses the touching moment, doing nothing to hide the tears that form.

For the first time in what feels like forever, she actually feels like everything's going to be ok.

* * *

 ** _Stay tuned for Hope having a sleepover at Harvey's during the next chapter! x_**


	9. Chapter 9

_**Hi guys! No, I haven't forgotten about this fic, I haven't forgotten about any of my fics and I plan on updating all my multi-chapters this week :)**_

* * *

The next month flew by in a blur; Harvey had done something he'd never done before, take time off work.

He had taken the whole month off, leaving Louis, Mike and Rachel running the firm, so that he could spend some quality time with Hope. Surprisingly, everyone had been more than willing to help out, Louis especially, after he had taken a day to digest the news that Harvey and Donna had a child together.

Considering how nervous he had been, Harvey had taken it in his stride, thinking back to what his own Father had been like and trying to be half the man he was, while enjoying the opportunity to make up for lost time with his, their, daughter.

He is staring out the window of his office, a smile gracing his lips as he thinks of a precious moment with Hope…

* * *

** FLASHBACK**

Walking hand in hand along the path in the Central Park Zoo, Hope spots the Polar Circle exhibit.

"Penguins!" She shouts excitedly, immediately pulling her Father's hand, in that direction.

As they enter the enclosure Hope runs straight to the glass, mesmerised by the way the penguins bob for food, the sound of a recording echoes through the space.

 _"King Penguins lay only one egg at a time and carry it around on their feet covered with a flap of abdominal skin called the brood patch. It is looked after in this manner for the whole of the average 55-day incubation period, being shuffled from one parent to the other every 6-18 days. When relieved of the egg, that parent then goes off to sea on an extended food foraging trip. Upon hatching, the chicks continue to be protected on the parent's feet and the brood patch for another 30-40 days after which time, they are large enough to be able to regulate their temperature for themselves."_

Harvey smiles down at her, her intrigued gaze reminding him of her Mother.

"Daddy, look at that one!" A little boy next to them says excitedly to his Father.

He can't help but notice her smile falter slightly as she looks over at the pair.

"Hey, are you ok?" He asks.

"Harvey?" Hope says, looking up at him.

"Yeah?"

"Why can't I call you Daddy?" She asks.

"Uh..." Harvey stutters, caught completely off guard by the question, "You can. I mean, if you want to, it's up to you, Hope."

"I want to." She smiles, a grin that matches his own.

"I'd like that."

** END OF FLASHBACK**

* * *

He snaps out of his day dream as the shrill ring of his cell echoes through his office. He can't help but smile when he see's who the caller is.

"Donna, hey." He grins.

"Hi, sorry to bother you at work."

"That's alright, everything okay?"

"It's my Dad, he's not feeling well and I just want to get him looked at…" She says, trying to mask her worry.

"Shit. Is there anything I can do?" He asks.

"Yeah, actually. Would you mind taking Hope? I know you're at work and it's a huge ask but…"

"It's no problem, Donna, do you need me to pick her up now?"

"No, it's ok, we're actually not far from the firm, I can drop her of now, if that's okay?"

"Sure, I'll see you soon." He says.

"Thanks, Harvey."

* * *

"Is Daddy up there?" Hope asks excitedly, trying to keep up with her Mom as they make their way through the foyer to the elevator.

"Yes, and he's looking forward to seeing you." Donna smiles, pressing the button for the 50th floor.

As the door opens and they enter the small space, Louis steps in behind them.

"Donna …mini Donna" He greets with a smile.

"Hey Louis" Donna says, leaning forward to give a small hug.

"You meeting Harvey?" He asks.

"Daddy's going to look after me." Hope explains.

"Oh yeah? You gonna be a lawyer for us one day?" Louis asks.

"Or COO." Donna jokes, nudging him slightly.

As they reach the 50th floor. The elevator dings, the doors open and they see Harvey is already there waiting for them.

"Daddy!" Hope squeals, running towards him.

"Hey, princess." He smiles, lifting her up for a hug.

"Thanks so much for this, Harvey, I can't thank you enough." Donna says.

"You don't have to thank me, Donna, anything I can do to help."

They look at each other for a few seconds too long before Donna clears her throat.

"So, I've packed a few things in here for her, hopefully I won't be too long."

"We'll be fine, just let me know how it all goes, okay?" He says softly.

"Okay." She says gently.

"I'll see you later, baby, be good, okay?" Donna says, giving Hope a kiss.

"I will" She promises, "Bye Momma"

* * *

Later that afternoon, Louis is typing away on his laptop, completely engrossed in what he's doing, so much so that he doesn't notice Hope standing beside him, watching him intently.

"Who's that?" She asks, pointing to the photo of his cat, startling Louis with her sudden presence.

"HOLY GOD DAMN SHIT!" He says, completely startled, "…you scared the crap out of me."

Hope's little mouth turns in to an 'O' "You said a swear." She whispers.

"No, no, no..." Louis says, attempting to backtrack, "You must have misheard me."

Hope just looks at him, a cute little smirk on her face. "Don't worry, I won't tell. Daddy's in the bathroom, he said to wait with you until he gets back." She explains.

"Would you like a drink? A soda maybe?" Louis offers, attempting to distract her.

Hope leans forward to look at the prunie sitting on his desk, "No thanks." She says, scrunching up her nose. "That smells like a diaper."

"How dare you." He responds instantly, in true Louis fashion.

"Wow!" Hope exclaims, spotting a picture of a ballerina on the cover of an arts magazine sitting on his desk. "She's pretty."

"She's exquisite." Louis agrees.

"I'm going to a ballerina when I grow up!" She says confidently, still looking at the photo, "Do you think I'll be that pretty, Louis?"

"I think you'll be the most breathtakingly beautiful prima ballerina, the world has ever seen." He smiles, lifting her on to his lap. "…and the most talented."

* * *

"Hello?" Harvey says, answering his cell on the third ring.

"Hey, it's me, I'm sorry this has taken so long!" Donna says.

"It's fine, Donna, is everything okay?" He asks, moving through his kitchen as they talk.

"He's okay, they've run some tests and they just want to keep him overnight for observation."

"Well don't worry about Hope, she's fine. We've had dinner, no one got food poisoning and we were just about to read a book." He reassures her.

Donna chuckles, "Well that's good to know! And let me guess, The Little Mermaid ...for the millionth time?"

Harvey pauses, "Maaaybe." He admits sheepishly.

She can't help but laugh, their girl certainly has him wrapped around her finger.

"I shouldn't be too much longer."

"It's okay, take your time." He says softly.

"Thanks, Harvey."

"Was that Momma?" Hope asks as she notices Harvey hanging up.

"Yeah, she'll be here soon." He explains, walking back to his room where she's sitting on the bed, book in hand.

"Can we still read my book?" She asks.

"Of course." He smiles.

"…I hope you had fun with me today." He says, climbing on to the bed beside her.

Hope nods, "I always have fun with you." She says innocently, like it's the most obvious thing in the world.

"I love you." He says, hugging her close to his side and softly kissing her forehead. Not quite sure why he was so nervous to say that to her for the first time.

"I love you too, Daddy."

* * *

After he doesn't answer the door, Donna decides to use the 'secret entrance' that Jessica taught her. Although, she's not really certain you can call persuading the super, who knows your Harvey's friend, to let you inside without him knowing, a secret entrance.

The first thing she notices as she steps inside, is the silence. There is not a noise to be heard and the only light on is the one in the kitchen. They aren't on the couch, so she heads to his room. She can't help but smile as she peeks in to his bedroom and finds them both asleep, Hope's arms raised up above her head in the exact same position as Harvey's.

Like Father like daughter, she thinks to herself, before pulling out her cell to snap a photo.

Tip-toeing over to the bed, she leans over to place a gentle kiss on Hope's forehead, smiling down at her, she brushes a strand of hair off her face. Donna heads over to Harvey's side next, sitting down beside him and admiring the heart-warming scene in front of her.

She automatically raises her hand to stroke his cheek gently. "Harvey." She whispers.

Harvey begins to wake, "Donna?"

"Hey" She smiles, "Sorry to let myself in, you didn't answer the door, I figured you'd fallen asleep."

"Are you guys ever going to tell me how the hell you get in here?" He asks.

"And ruin all my fun?" She teases, inciting a smile from him.

"Was she okay?"

"Perfect." He whispers, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." She nods, "Just tired."

"What time is it?" He asks, looking over at the bedside table, searching for his clock.

"A little after ten. Anyway, I should get her home." She says, standing to return to Hope's side of the bed.

"Do you want me to take you?" He asks.

"No, it's ok. I've got my Dad's car downstairs." She explains.

Donna gently picks Hope up, careful not to wake her, adjusting herself so that her daughter can rest her head on her shoulder.

"Go back to sleep, we'll see you tomorrow." She whispers, making her way out of the room, picking up Hope's bag as she goes.

"Donna, wait." Harvey says jogging after them, catching them as they reach the front door.

"What?"

"I was wondering if it would be okay for her to start staying over, tonight was really nice and I just…"

"She'd love that, Harvey." Donna interrupts "…And so would I."

Harvey smiles, opening the front door for them, "Thanks."

Donna leans in to kiss his cheek gently, "Goodnight, Harvey."

"Goodnight, Donna."

* * *

Donna's wakes to the sound of knocking; it takes her a moment to realize that's what it is.

She glances over at her alarm clock, positive she's not reading 1.30am correctly.

Who the hell would be knocking at this hour?

As she trudges downstairs, still wrapping her silk robe around her, she spots him through the glass, the moonlight highlighting his features. Turning the nearest light on, she opens the door.

"Harvey, what are you doing here?" She asks, thoroughly confused.

He flashes that boyish grin, holding up Hope's teddy bear.

"You left Mason behind."

Donna smiles, accepting the bear from him, placing it on the hallway table, "You didn't have to do that, we could have just got it tomorrow."

"I know. But then I wouldn't be able to do this…" He says, stepping forward, cupping her face in his hands and crashing his lips against hers.

It takes her by surprise for a second, before she responds, pulling him down towards her, clinging to him as his tongue moves sensually against hers.

"Harvey." She breathes out as his lips move to her neck.

He pulls back suddenly, looking her square in the eyes while the pads of his thumbs stroke her cheeks, "I want to be with you, Donna. I want us to be a family." He says.

Her heart soars at the revelation and she blinks back the tears forming in her eyes.

This is really happening, she thinks to herself.

Without a word Donna takes him by the hand, pulls him inside and closes the door behind them. She kisses him again and he lifts her up, leading them upstairs to her room with her legs wrapped tightly around him.

When they reach the room, Harvey sets her down on the ground, peeling off her robe in the process, leaving her in only a silk and lace camisole with matching shorts. Donna quickly undoes the buttons of his shirt, kissing her way down his chest, as soon as the material is gone, she starts on his belt and pants, leaving him in only his boxers.

Harvey drops to his knees, pulling her shorts down her legs slowly as he kisses his way up her thigh. His mouth finds her centre and her knees instantly go weak, she has to hold on to his shoulders to make sure her knees don't buckle as she feels his tongue moving against her.

"Oh God" She moans as her eyes roll back, she knows this is going to be over way too quick if she's not careful.

It's been far too long.

"Harvey, please." She begs weakly, "I need you now."

At her words, Harvey stops, finishing with one last kiss against her before standing again, walking them towards the bed. Donna pushes him backwards, inciting an anticipative moan from him as his back hits the mattress. She leans down to kiss his chest again, starting a trail of sensual kisses down his stomach to his pelvic bone. Her own anticipative moan escapes her as her fingers grip the waistband of his boxers, pulling them down his legs and allowing his thick length to spring free. Within seconds her warm mouth surrounds him, his fingers grip her hair lightly as she moves in exactly the way he loves.

She can sense he's as on edge as she is, stopping what she is doing to straddle his lap. Harvey sits up to kiss her, one hand lost in her auburn tresses, the other creeping under her camisole. Donna lifts the garment up and over her head, leaving nothing separating them as she sinks down on him.

Fuck.

She's forgotten how big he is and he senses that she needs a second to adjust, kissing her deeply as his hands run over her bare skin, reacquainting himself with his favorite person. Their breaths mingle, lips barely touching as she begins to move.

Harvey lays down flat as Donna braces herself against his chest, rolling her hips against his, building up a steady rhythm before he meets her thrust for thrust.

It's not long before it all becomes too much and he hits the point of no return, closely followed by her, their orgasms ripping through them with an overwhelming intensity.

The only sound to be heard is their heavy breathing as they try to regain their composure. Harvey sits up again, pulling her closer and kissing her chest, neck and lips gently.

"I love you, Donna." He whispers, his lips skimming hers lightly.

"I love you too." She whispers back.

Donna sits up abruptly in her bed, panicked; snapping back to reality.

It was just a dream.

She runs her shaking hands over her face and through her hair as she struggles to regulate her rapid breathing, the thoughts of _them_ still fresh in her mind.

It was only a dream.

Shit.

* * *

 _ **Please leave me a review and let me know your thoughts x**_


	10. Chapter 10

_**Okay, a couple of things to note, firstly, this is a very M rated chapter – you have been warned.**_

 _ **Secondly, this is a belated birthday gift for Blue, thank you for always being so kind - HAPPY BIRTHDAY! xx**_

 _ **This is also dedicated to Martine as I know it's her favorite and it has been a long time between updates.**_

 _ **Hope you enjoy! x**_

* * *

Weeks passed and Harvey had Donna seemed to develop a comfortable rhythm. As expected, Hope had jumped at the chance to start having sleepovers at her Dad's house and to Harvey's delight, Donna was happy to let him have as much time with her as he wanted, his weekends almost always revolving around spending time with their daughter.

Unfortunately today, a case at the firm needed his attention and instead of being able to spend the day with his two favorite redheads, he had to spend the day listening to Louis ranting about the disrespect a former client was showing the firm while disagreeing with every tactic Harvey suggested using.

Exhausted and eager to see his girl, he chanced a drop by, hoping they'd be home.

A few moments after knocking, Harvey came face to face with Jim opening the door.

"Harvey." He says, slightly surprised.

"Jim, hi." Harvey begins.

"Come in." Jim offers, stepping aside.

"How are you?"

"Better, thank-you."

"I'm sorry to just drop by." Harvey starts, "I was just hoping to…"

"They're not here." Jim explains, walking in to the living room, Harvey following closely behind.

"Donna took Hope shopping, I'm not actually sure what time they'll be back."

Damn. Harvey thinks to himself, the wave of disappointment currently hitting him making him realize just how much he had missed them.

"Can I get you a drink?" Jim offers.

"Sure." Harvey agrees, slightly surprised by the offer, Jim never having been his biggest fan.

"You're probably surprised." Jim chuckles, pouring them both a glass of scotch.

"You could say that."

"I know we've had our differences over the years, Harvey, but I don't have an issue with you."

"I appreciate that..."

"In fact, I'm glad you're in my daughter's life again." Jim admits.

"If it were up to me, I never would have been out of her life." Harvey says.

"I know that."

"If I had known…" Harvey begins.

"You don't need to explain anything to me, Harvey, I know."

Harvey nods. "Thank you, James."

"It's an unfortunate situation you both found yourselves in. It's hard to believe that there are people in the world who would do something like that…"

"It's my fault." Harvey says, in a defeated tone.

"No. It's not." James says, assuredly. "A jealous, bitter woman saw what you had with Donna and made a horrible decision. That's all."

Harvey says nothing, taking a sip of his drink, trying to suppress the rage he still has towards Paula.

"Do you know why I'm glad you're there for Donna?" James continues.

"Because you know I care about her." Harvey answers.

"Because you're the one person in the world, besides her mother, that I know loves her as much as I do." James says sincerely.

Harvey's mouth falls open slightly at the admission, surprised and yet unable to argue the fact.

"I may have disagreed with your methods over the years, but I have never doubted the fact that I knew you would always protect her."

James continues. "You're the Father of my Granddaughter, Harvey. You're family."

"I'd do anything for either of them." Harvey admits.

"I know." James says seriously. "…and that's why I need you to promise me something."

"Okay…" Harvey says cautiously.

"I want you to promise me that after I'm gone, you'll look after them."

"Jim…"

"I've had a good life; I'm not saying it's going to be tomorrow, but it is going to happen, Harvey, I know that, and I've made my peace with it. I just need to know my girl is going to be okay when I'm gone, both my girls." Jim says solemnly.

"I'll never let anything happen to them, Jim, I promise."

"Thank you, Harvey."

"You're welcome."

"What is it?" James asks, examining the look on Harvey's face.

"I can't ever get back the time that we've missed." Harvey says despondently.

"Hope adores you! I can't get her to stop talking any time she gets home from being with you." James says, causing Harvey to chuckle.

"…But you weren't just talking about Hope."

Harvey looks at James and then back down at his glass.

"She lost faith in me. She's always been the one person I could trust and who stood by me no matter what, she _always_ had faith in me. But, because I am the way I am, when Paula…" Harvey sighs. "…Donna actually believed I could do something like that."

James stands from the couch and heads over to a nearby shelf.

"There's something I want you to see."

* * *

Harvey sits on his couch watching the DVD James had given him; a collection of home videos.

.

" _You look beautiful, honey"_ James' voice can be heard from behind the camera. A heavily pregnant Donna on the screen, standing in what he assumes was Hope's nursery, folding baby clothes against her belly. _"I look like the Earth should be revolving around me!"_ Donna retorts.

.

Harvey can't help but laugh at her sass and agree with James' sentiments; she's beautiful.

.

"… _You look beautiful, I can't believe how much your bump has grown since the last time I visited."_ James says.

" _Less than two months to go."_ Donna smiles, rubbing her hand over her belly.

.

About a half hour later, Harvey had watched three more videos and had just begun watching another.

.

The camera moves until Mark's face appears onscreen.

" _Okay, it's go time! we're on our way to the hospital. How you feeling, babe?"_

The camera pans to Donna, sitting on the couch breathing out slowly.

" _Like my uterus is about to explode!"_ She says in a very Donna-esque manner.

.

Tears form in his eyes and Harvey's heart sinks as he watches Mark do what he should have been able to do, everything he missed out on.

To Harvey's surprise though, it's not Mark in the room with her, it's her Mom.

.

" _Come on Donna, I need another big push from you."_ He hears the doctor say.

" _I AM PUSHING!"_ Donna says forcefully, through clenched teeth.

" _You can do it, Donna, come on."_ Encourages her Mom.

" _UGHH, JESUS! THIS KID HAS HARVEY'S FAT HEAD!"_ Donna yells, pushing with all her might, squeezing her Mom's hand.

.

Harvey chuckles at the outburst.

.

" _I can't do this Mom, I need Harvey."_ Donna cries.

" _Honey, listen to me, you can do this. You're going to do this for you and for Harvey and for your baby."_

Donna lets out a sob as her Mom pulls her closer, bringing Donna's forehead against her own.

" _You can do this. Now push!"_

Donna musters her strength to push even harder.

" _You're nearly there, Donna. I need one more big push."_ The doctor encourages _._

Donna grips her Mom's hand and pushes as hard as she can, relief washing over her when she hears the sound of her baby crying.

" _It's a girl."_ The doctor announces, _"…a beautiful baby girl."_

" _I want to see her."_ Donna cries.

" _You did it honey, you did it. I am so proud of you!"_ Her Mom praises.

" _Here she is."_ A nurse says, placing Hope on Donna's chest for some skin to skin time.

" _Hi baby."_ Donna whispers, a tear running down her cheeks as she kisses the top of Hope's head.

.

Harvey tear's up as he watches the two of them on the screen.

.

In the next video the voice of Donna's Dad can be heard behind the camera. _"She's so beautiful"._ He says, as Donna gazes down at Hope who is cradled in her arms.

" _Yeah, I kinda like her."_ Donna smiles.

" _How are you feeling?"_ He asks.

" _I'm okay, a little sore."_ She answers, _"But I'd do it again in a heartbeat!"_ She coos, talking to Hope.

" _Can I get you anything?"_

" _Actually, I'd kill for a decent coffee!"_ Donna admits.

" _Of course sweetheart, I'll run down to the coffee shop."_ James says, placing the camera down on the table.

" _Thanks, Daddy."_ Donna smiles.

.

Harvey assumes James must have forgotten to turn the camera off when he sees James walk in front of the camera and out the door. Donna still in the shot, looking down lovingly at Hope asleep on the bed in front of her.

.

" _Mom!"_ Donna greets her mother happily as she walks through the door about ten seconds later.

" _How are my two favourite girls?"_

" _We're good."_ Donna smiles, _"Wanna hold her?"_

" _Just try and stop me!"_

Donna smiles, watching her mother holding her grandbaby. _"I can't believe how much I love her."_

" _A Mothers love is instant, honey"_ She says, _"…and so is a Grandmother's"_ She coos at the baby.

" _I hope we're as close as you and I are Mom."_

" _You will be, a bond between a mother and daughter is unbreakable."_ She smiles, _"…Even though I know you'll always be Daddy's princess."_ She teases.

Donna chuckles, but her smile quickly falters.

" _Honey, I'm sorry."_ Her Mom apologizes quickly, _"I didn't mean to…"_

" _I know, Mom. It's okay."_ Donna reassures.

" _Talk to me sweetheart."_

" _I wish he was here."_ Donna admits, tearing up. _"Even after everything, I still want him here."_

" _I understand."_

" _I don't want to, Mom, I don't. I just can't figure out how to cut him out of me."_ Donna says, wiping a tear from her cheek.

.

A lone tear falls down Harvey's cheek as he continues watching. _Fucking Paula_ he seethes.

.

" _Do you love him?"_

Donna looks up at her Mom _, "I don't want to."_

" _Then let me ask you something else… As angry as you are, if he showed up right now, would you listen to him? Would you want to work it out?"_

When Donna says nothing, her Mother continues _"…Donna, you are the most intuitive person I've ever known. If you can't let go of him, even after everything has happened, I think it means you think there is something worth believing in."_

" _I'm with Mark, Mom."_

" _And Mark is fantastic, he is."_ She says gently, _"…All I'm saying is if Harvey is still in your heart, after all that you've been through, maybe you just need to have hope that it will all work out in the end. That everything will end up the way it's supposed to."_

The moment is interrupted by a nurse walking in to the room. _"Oh. I'm sorry to interrupt"_ She excuses herself.

" _It's okay."_ Donna smiles, wiping her tears, _"Just hormones."_ She laughs off.

" _That's normal, sweetie."_ The nurse reassures her, checking her vitals. _"Everything looks good."_

" _Great."_

" _Have you picked a name yet?"_ The nurse queries.

Donna looks down at the baby and up at her Mom before looking back at the nurse.

" _Hope."_

* * *

The shrill sound of Harvey's phone echoes through his apartment, looking down at the screen he sees that it's Donna.

"Hi." He says, answering the call.

"Hey." She says, "…Dad said you dropped by."

"Yeah, I was just hoping to see you after work."

"Me, or you daughter?" Donna teases. At Harvey's silence she continues "…Harvey are you okay?"

Harvey clears his throat in an attempt to pull himself together, "Yeah, just a rough day."

"I know something that might make you feel better…"

"And what's that?" Harvey asks.

He hears the shuffling of the phone.

"Hi Daddy!" Hope says elatedly.

"Hi Princess." He smiles, "How was your day?"

"It was good - Momma took me shopping! I got two new dresses and three new shoes, and a new swimsuit and we had lunch and I got a chocolate shake and we bought Grandma a birthday present and then we went to the park." She rattles off to her Dad with excitement.

Harvey can only chuckle at his adorable girl, "It sounds like you had lots of fun."

"Uh-huh, but I missed you." She says honestly.

"I missed you too."

"Are you coming to get me tomorrow?"

"I wouldn't miss it."

He can hear Donna saying something to Hope in the background.

"Momma said its past my bedtime." She says.

"Well you'd better get to bed then, honey." Harvey says gently.

"Okay." Hope agrees. "Goodnight, Daddy."

"I love you, goodnight."

"Love you."

"Hey." Donna says, taking the phone back from Hope.

"God, I love her." Harvey chuckles.

"Told you she'd make you feel better."

"Thanks, Donna." Harvey smiles.

"She asked me about your Mom today…"

"What?" Harvey says, surprised.

"When we were buying the gift for my Mom, she asked me about yours and then we got talking about how your family live in Boston."

"I didn't expect that." Harvey admits.

"She's a smart kid, Harvey." Donna says, "…She also asked if we can go see them."

"She did?"

"She did." Donna confirms, "So I was thinking, if it's okay with you and your Mom and Marcus, maybe we could go see them next weekend?"

"After I told them about everything, they really want to meet her, they're planning on coming up here in a few weeks when schools out. But I'd love for them to meet her sooner."

"Then let's go." Donna insists.

"I'll buy the tickets tomorrow." He grins.

* * *

"Are you excited baby?" Donna asks Hope, fastening her in to the car seat as Harvey loads their luggage in to the rental car outside the Boston airport.

"Yeah!" Hope says with a smile.

"Are we nearly there?" She asks as Harvey climbs in to the driver's seat, starting the car.

"Not long now" He smiles.

A little while in to the ride, Hope speaks up from the backseat.

"Daddy, who is going to be there?"

"Uh, my Mom, your Grandma, my brother, your Uncle Marcus and your Aunt Katie and your cousins Harrison and Caitlin."

"What about…" Donna whispers.

"He's away for work." Harvey answers before she's finished "…Thank God."

Donna offers him an understanding smile as Hope speaks again.

"What about your Daddy?" She asks innocently.

Donna looks at Harvey, she knows Hope has her intuition and had been waiting for Hope to make the connection that they hadn't talked about Gordon yet.

"My Daddy died a long time ago honey." Harvey explains.

"Oh." Hope says sadly. "That makes me feel sad."

"Me too." Harvey says.

The remainder of the trip is quiet, Harvey regularly glancing back in the mirror, watching Hope as she looks out the window.

Pulling up at the house, Donna collects Hope from her car seat.

"Are you ok, baby?" she asks, holding Hope in her arms.

Hope looks up at Harvey as he leans against the car next to them.

"I don't want you to die."

"Come here." Harvey says, taking her from Donna, her little arms wrapping around his broad shoulders.

"My Dad got really sick, that's why he died honey. I'm not going anywhere."

"Promise?" She says quietly.

"Not until I'm really, really, really, old and my body doesn't work properly anymore."

"Like 50?" She asks, making her Mom and Dad laugh.

"More like 100." Harvey smiles, kissing her forehead. "I miss my Dad everyday and it makes me really sad that he never got to meet you because I know how much your Grandpa Gordon would have loved you."

"That makes me sad too." She agrees.

"But I will tell you anything you want to know about him and lucky for us, there are a bunch of people in that house right there that are really excited to meet you …and I know they're going to love you."

"Are you ready to meet them?" Donna asks.

"Yeah." Hope nods.

* * *

Lily answers the door eagerly, her hands covering her mouth in awe when she looks at Hope in Harvey's arms.

"Oh my goodness" She says, tearing up.

"Hey Mom." Harvey grins, stepping forward to offer her a kiss on the cheek.

"Hi." Lily smiles looking between the three of them.

"Mom, this is Donna," Harvey nods towards her.

"It's so nice to finally meet you." Lily says, offering Donna a hug.

"You too." Donna smiles, hugging her back.

"And this…" He says, "is our daughter, Hope. Hope, this is your Grandma Lily."

"Hi." Hope smiles brightly.

"Well hello, it is so lovely to meet you, Hope" Lily says with tears in her eyes, holding her arms out to her. Hope happily leans out to accept the embrace, transferring from Harvey's arms to Lily's.

"Come in, come in." She says happily, ushering them all inside.

* * *

After a morning of meeting, catching up and reminiscing they all find themselves outside, Donna and Lily sitting together on the porch while Harvey, Marcus and the kids play baseball on the grass.

"I'm so glad you came, Donna." Lily says, smiling at the scene in front of them.

"Me too, Lily." Donna smiles.

"Hope is so beautiful."

"I think so too."

"I can't imagine how hard it must have been to have had to deal with that vile woman did to you, I'm so sorry." Lily offers.

"Thank-you, its was horrible but we're trying to make the m'ost of it now."

Looking out at Harvey with Hope Lily smiles, "Watching him with her reminds me of Gordon, the boys were his entire world."

"He was always so proud of Harvey." Donna agrees.

"It's nice to finally meet the vivacious, gorgeous woman who keeps Harvey on his toes, as Gordon would say." Lily chuckles.

"He talked about me?"

"Oh God yes!" Lily laughs, "Every time he'd speak to Harvey, I know he'd always ask about you too."

"He was a great man." Donna adds. "Harvey's a lot like him.

"He was the best." Lily agrees. "…And while we're on the subject of Gordon and Harvey, I wanted to thank you."

"For what?" Donna asks.

"For the part you played in Harvey and I making amends…" Lily explains.

"How did you…"

"He told me someone very special to him convinced him …and a blind person can see that that person is you." Lily says, grabbing Donna's hand to hold, "So, from the bottom of my heart, thank you."

"You're welcome." Donna smiles.

"Momma!" Hope shouts excitedly, "Uncle Marcus said we can go in the pool! Will you come too?"

"I don't think I brought my suit baby."

"Yes you did, I saw it in your bag, please Momma, pleeeeeeeease!" Hope begs.

"Yeah Momma, pleeeeeease" Harvey teases, scooping Hope up in his arms, both of them giving her their best 'please face'.

"Oh fine." She chuckles, "let's go!"

* * *

"CANONBALL!" Marcus shouts, jumping in to the pool, causing the kids to erupt in laughter and splashing Donna, Lily and Katie in the process. The three women watching from the recliners.

"Marcus!" Donna laughs, "Try not to be a bigger kid than the children."

"Not gonna happen." Harvey laughs from behind her, carrying out fresh beers for the adults.

"True, it feels like I have three kids most days." Katie laughs.

As Harvey reaches her line of sight, Donna can't help but admire his casual attire, clad in only navy boardshorts, a white t-shirt and flip flops, he's a far cry from designer suit loving lawyer she's used to.

"Daddy, come play!" Hope says as Harvey passes Marcus a fresh beer.

"Coming baby." He smiles, kicking off his flip flops and yanking his t-shirt off, revealing his tanned torso.

He was more defined then she remembered, evidence that he'd taken good care of himself over their years apart. Donna couldn't help but stare at his well sculpted pecs and abs, not to mention his toned arm muscles, most likely thanks to his love for boxing and running.

"You coming?" Harvey offers, drawing her attention away from his physique.

"I guess I can be persuaded."

Donna stands and pulls her t-shirt over her head before unbuttoning and shimmying out of the denim shorts she has on, exposing her toned body clad in only a black string bikini.

Harvey's breath hitches in his throat and he can't help but stare at her.

God she's gorgeous, he thinks to himself.

Katie and Lily exchange a knowing look, the attraction between the two obvious and the tension palpable. "Well this should be interesting." Katie says quietly with a smile.

"Where are you going?" Harvey asks as Donna starts walking away.

"Over to the stairs." She says, pointing in that direction. "I like to get in slowly."

"You know I could just save us both some time." He offers with a cheeky grin.

"Harvey, don't you dare!" She warns, walking backwards.

"What?" He teases, edging closer.

"Harvey…"

"Donna…"

She squeals as he picks her up abruptly, jumping in to the pool with a splash.

"HARVEY!" Donna laughs as she comes up for air, slapping him across the chest playfully.

"What?" He says, feigning innocence. "I was just helping you get in."

"Uh-uh, Momma, NO HITTING. You say so!" Hope scolds, swimming up to them, clutching on to Harvey.

"You're right baby, I'm sorry" She says, kissing her on the cheek with a chuckle.

"And Daddy too!" Hope says.

Shaking her head and ignoring Harvey's shit eating grin, Donna places a soft kiss on Harvey's cheek too. "Sorry Daddy."

"Let's play volleyball with Caitlin and Harry." Hope says eagerly, wanting to go back to playing with her cousins.

"You two go, I'll watch." Donna says, happy to spectate from the side.

"That kid melts my heart." Marcus smiles, swimming up beside her. "All red hair and sass."

"Join the club."

"I'm really glad you're here, Donna, it's been too long since I saw you last."

"Me too, Marcus, I can't believe it's been so long."

"You know, I haven't seen that dickhead so happy in a long time." Marcus says, smiling at Harvey throwing Hope up in the air.

Donna can't help but laugh at the brotherly nickname. "He's a great Dad" She beams.

"He is." Marcus agrees, "…and my niece is frickin adorable."

"Can't argue there." Donna smiles.

"…But it's not just Hope that's making him happy." Marcus adds knowingly.

* * *

Later that night, Donna was reading a book in bed when she hears a quiet knock on the guest room door.

"Hey." Harvey says softly.

"Hey." She says, placing her book down "Did she fall asleep okay?"

"Yeah." He says, "…After she somehow roped each adult and her two older cousins in to reading her a bedtime story."

"Pushovers." Donna laughs.

"Hey, I don't deny that girl has 100% control over me." He counters, sitting down on the bed beside her.

"I think she had a wonderful time today."

"So did I." He admits. "…and my entire family is smitten with her."

"Your Mom gave her three helpings of dessert!" She chuckles.

Harvey looks away sheepishly.

"And how many did you sneak her?" Donna probes.

"I plead the fifth."

"Fine!" She laughs, "but if she wakes up with a stomach ache tonight, you're on Daddy duty!"

"Deal."

"You okay?" She asks, noticing his smile falter slightly.

"I'm just really missing my Dad today." Harvey explains.

"Hey, look at me." She says gently, waiting until his eyes meet hers. "He'd be so proud of you, Harvey."

"…and I have no doubt in my mind that he would spoil Hope even more than you. I know he's watching out for her."

"You think?" He asks.

"I know."

"Thanks Donna." He says, squeezing her hand.

"You're welcome." She replies, as their eyes meet again and linger a little to long.

Their heads draw closer and Harvey moves to close the gap between them, her warm breath skimming his bottom lip when…

"Momma?" A dreary eyed Hope calls sleepily from the door, breaking the intimate moment.

"Hey honey. Are you okay?" Donna asks.

"Can I sleep with you?"

"Of course, come on." She says, pulling back the covers on the bed.

Hope closes the door and makes her way over, Harvey helps her up in to the bed, watching as she easily settles in her mothers' arms and Donna strokes her hair lovingly, Hope almost instantly starting to fall back asleep.

"I'll leave you to it," Harvey says, leaning down to kiss Hope, "Sweet dreams." He whispers.

"Daddy, will you stay too?" Hope asks sleepily, clutching her fathers' hand.

"Of course I will." He says without hesitation, laying down beside her, kissing her cheek as he pulls the covers over the three of them.

Donna watches as Hope snuggles up between them, reaching behind her she turns off the light and settles in beside Hope, smiling to herself when she feels Harvey's arm draping over the two of them protectively.

* * *

The remainder of the weekend fly's by in a flash, before they know it Sunday evening has arrived and they're back in New York. Their farewell in Boston luckily not as bittersweet with the promise of being reunited in a few short weeks.

Upon their return Jim had asked to watch Hope for the evening, after missing her over the weekend and so Donna took Harvey up on his offer of a movie and take out at his place.

"Oh she had Marcus wrapped around her little finger! I've never seen a more adorable grown man wearing a tutu and a tiara at a teddy bears tea party." Donna laughs, walking back from the kitchen with two glasses of wine.

"Uh, excuse me?!" Harvey jokes, motioning to himself.

"Present company excluded." She jests, handing him a wine glass.

"It was great, Donna, thank-you."

"You don't need to thank me, Harvey."

"If you told me four years ago that I'd be going to spend the weekend with my Mother, I'd have told you you were crazy." Harvey says.

"What?" He prompts, noticing the small smile that graces her lips.

"It's nothing."

"Donna." He says, taking her wine glass and placing it down on the coffee table with his own. "What is it?"

"It's just something your Mom told me." She answers, "…She said you told her that someone special encouraged you to make up with her …and that she knew that person was me."

"It was." Harvey confirms, rather matter of factly.

He can see Donna doesn't quite know what to say so he continues on.

"Donna, you've always been special to me" He says sincerely, "…you know that."

When she still doesn't respond, he moves to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, caressing her cheek gently as he does. With their face's inches apart, Donna leans in to close the gap, this time without any interruptions.

What starts as a gentle kiss, lips gently grazing, quickly heats up, Harvey plunging his tongue in to her mouth as he grips behind her ear and the back of her neck, pulling her closer. Donna quickly moves to straddle his lap, running her hands through his hair, deepening the kiss.

Harvey pulls the drawstring at the back of her sundress, loosening the top of it as he kisses her neck, a heavy breath escaping donna's lips as his tongue meets her skin. Donna grinds against him, his hands finding her ass underneath her dress, squeezing it firmly. Their lips meet again, tongues clashing as Donna shimmy's back and starts to unzip his pants, frantically trying to free his now rock-hard length.

"Fuck, Donna." He moans in to her mouth as she strokes him firmly. His hands gripping her dress, gathering it at her hips. He lifts her dress up and over her head, revealing her perfect breasts to him and confirming the fact that she hadn't been wearing a bra.

Like a magnet, Harvey sucks her left nipple in to his mouth, biting gently, inciting a moan from her before she pulls his t-shirt up and over his head, revealing his toned chest and abs. She can't help but lean down to kiss his firm chest, her tongue sneaking out to taste his skin, the way she's been dying to since watching him in the pool in Boston. Donna places a hand flat against his abs and shifts on his lap, pulling her lace thong aside and sinking down on him, gasping as she stretches around his thick length.

Harvey is without a doubt the biggest guy she's ever been with, not surprising really, it was as if even his cock was an honest representation of him; powerful, addictive …perfect.

"Are you okay?" He whispers, dropping a gentle kiss on her lips.

Donna nods, gripping his shoulders tightly as she begins to move, an adorable frown on her face serving as another reminder that he was stretching her in the best possible way.

Harvey breaks their kiss, "Donna, wait." He says breathlessly.

Donna stops instantly, her heart sinks as she immediately thinks he's changed his mind.

"No." He whispers, as though he knows what she's thinking.

He kisses her again, "Just not here." He says, tucking himself back in to his boxers and helping her off his lap. Harvey toes off his shoes and socks before standing, taking her by the hand and leading her to his bedroom.

When they reach his bed, he spins her around, kissing her passionately again before pushing her backwards, onto the mattress. Removing his pants and boxers, Harvey stokes himself slowly, admiring Donna's almost naked form looking up at him, biting her lip.

Harvey pulls Donna back up, making her stand before him as he sits down on the bed. Gripping her thighs, he pulls her closer, kissing his way down her toned stomach. Donna's breathing quickens with every kiss he drops against her skin, she can feel the wetness pool as his fingers toy with the waistband of her thong, he drops a kiss against the lace, groaning as he realises how wet she is. Donna's hands find his shoulders, steadying herself as he removes her panties, stepping out of them slowly. Harvey looks up at her, holding her stare as he reaches out to taste her.

God it's been way too long since she's felt him like this.

Her head drops back as his tongue moves against her, her grip on his hair tightening with every movement.

"Oh, Harvey." She moans, her hands slide up her stomach, gripping her breasts as she revels in the bliss she's feeling.

Harvey spreads her open watching her closely as he sucks on her clit, smirking to himself as he sees her drop her head back again. Lapping at her sweetness fervently, he starts stroking himself again, moving furiously until he notices her legs starting to shake. Clutching her ass, Harvey presses her harder against him, pulling her down towards the mattress, forcing her to straddle his face.

"Oh, Jesus!" She moans, gripping his hair tightly as she grinds against his face.

Harvey slides his hands up her torso, gripping her breasts firmly, encouraging her to move against his mouth. Clutching his hands tightly, Donna's breathing quickens, and she begins letting out tiny whimpers as he brings her closer to the edge. Harvey flips her over onto her back, his tongue finding her centre again, continuing the assault on her pussy. Within minutes he has her arching her back, crying out in ecstasy as he makes her come, hard.

Donna struggles to catch her breath, delirious as she comes down from her high, she smiles feeling Harvey kiss and lick his way up her body. He places a soft kiss against her lips, positioning himself above her. She let's out a moan as he presses in to her, stretching her again, his tongue moves against hers, stifling her groan as he pushes deeper.

Harvey caresses her gently, pushing her hair off her face as he begins pounding a steady rhythm between her legs, Donna runs her hands through his hair, gripping tightly with each hard thrust.

"I missed you." He whispers against her lips.

"I missed you too." She says softly, pulling his face down towards her for another passionate kiss.

Donna clutches his shoulders, kissing them as he continues slamming in to her, groaning again as Harvey kisses her neck, pinning her hands against the bed.

"Oh God, yes." She cries, loving the feeling of every movement inside her.

Harvey shifts slightly, lifting Donna's legs from under her knees as he steadies himself against the mattress, all without missing a thrust. "Oh, fuck" He groans.

After a few minutes Harvey pulls out, kissing her again before laying flat on his back, Donna taking it as a silent invitation to climb on top of him. Moving on to his lap she lifts his penis, guiding him back inside her, moving her hips against his. Harvey's hands come to rest on her hips, watching her as she sets a lazy rhythm. "God, you feel so good." He moans.

Placing her hands flat against his chest, Donna picks up the pace, pleasure radiating through her as Harvey meets with every upward thrust, moving fast and steady in perfect synchronisation. She grips his chest harder, her nails pressing in to his skin, the action only turn him on more.

He's close and he knows it, and when Donna lets out a breathless "Harvey", he takes it as an opportunity to flip her back over, on his knees now Harvey grabs her by her hips, lifting her slightly while he pistons in to her as fast as he can.

"Oh God." She moans, rubbing her clit furiously as he fucks her.

It's that sexy image that pushes him over the edge, his thrusts becoming deeper and uneven, he pulls out and starts to jerk off aggressively over her, coming all over her lower torso.

Leaning down he places a soft kiss on her lips, surprised when she pulls his head down harder, kissing him deeply.

"Keep fucking me" She says breathlessly.

"What?" He says, panting, brushing a strand of hair off her face.

"Keep fucking me, Harvey." She demands, pushing his cock back inside her before kissing him again.

Harvey groans in to her mouth and starts thrusting again, completely turned on by the request.

"Fuck, yes!" She moans as Harvey starts rubbing her clit with his thumb.

"You are so sexy." He replies. "I've wanted this for so long."

"Me too." She says in to his mouth before sliding her tongue against his.

They barely make it five minutes before they both come again, Donna whimpering in Harvey's ear while he fucks her to the point of no return.

"Harveyyyyyy" She moans, clutching his strong back, her second orgasm sending waves of intense pleasure through her. The sound of her coming enough to send Harvey over the edge for the second time, his handsome features scrunching together as he comes deep inside her uttering a "Fuck, Donna" with his release.

"That was incredible." Donna gasps, leaning up to kiss him again.

"You're incredible." He says, before kissing her back.

* * *

Donna wakes in the middle of the night, blinking as her eyes adjust to her surroundings, she smiles as Harvey comes in to view. The lights from the skyline lighting up the room enough for her to be able to see his sleeping form in front of her, laying on his back with his arm around her, completely spent having passed out after their fourth round.

She kisses his shoulder and slips out of bed silently, grabbing one of his work shirts off the chair and slipping it on, not bothering to button it up as she makes her way to the kitchen to get a drink. Pouring herself a glass of water, Donna glances over at Harvey in the bedroom while taking a sip.

Had the last eight hours actually happened? What did this mean? Are they together now?

Don't overthink this, Donna, she thinks to herself.

The memories of Harvey's lips on hers and him moving inside her send a shiver up her spine and give her an idea. Finishing her drink and placing the glass in the sink, she heads back to the bedroom.

Donna pulls the comforter back as she climbs back in bed, uncovering Harvey's naked body; specifically his thick cock - which is now hard again, biting her lip at the sight. Positioning herself over his legs, she cups his balls, massaging them gently as she licks the head of his penis. Swallowing his length, Donna begins moving her head up and down, sucking on his erect shaft. She can still taste herself on him from earlier and it does nothing to dampen her desire for him, taking him as deep as she can, inciting a gentle moan from Harvey as he sleeps.

"Donna." He moans softly, beginning to stir from his slumber.

Hearing him call out for her in his sleep only spurs Donna on, speeding up her actions as her hands move up his hips.

"Oh fuck!" Harvey groans, waking to look down at the scene causing him the immense pleasure he's feeling.

His hands lose themselves in her hair, guiding her warm mouth up and down his cock.

It's not long before her feels a familiar tightening in his groin and Donna sends him over the edge with a perfect mix of her mouth, tongue and hands.

"You are amazing." He praises, watching with hooded eyes as she licks him clean.

"Oh yeah?" She says with a sultry tone, kissing her way up his stomach, grazing her teeth across his right nipple before kissing his lips, "…prove it."

Donna squeals in delight as Harvey flips her over, leaning back against the pillows she watches as Harvey kisses a trail from her neck to her chest, sucking her right nipple in to his mouth as he palms her left breast.

"Do you realize how sexy you look like this in my shirt?" He asks before kissing her stomach.

Shifting down to settle between her legs, Harvey grins up at her before placing a gentle kiss against her core. He moves slowly, kissing her sensually in the same way he kisses her mouth, sucking gently with his lips and massaging her with his tongue.

"Oh, God." She moans, gripping his hair, pressing him closer to her.

The combination of his mouth against her and his hands roaming her body sending her in to sensory overload. Harvey smirks when he hears her moaning, slipping two fingers inside her, working them in perfect harmony, complimenting the motions of his mouth on her. Picking up the pace, he starts moving his fingers faster, flicking his tongue over her clit at the same speed.

"Fuck!" She gasps in ecstasy, "Harvey, I'm going to come."

Harvey stops suddenly, sitting back on his knees, smirking at her cussing him out for stopping suddenly. He sucks on the fingers he had inside her before she pulls them down to her mouth to do the same, making him groan.

Positioning himself at her entrance, he guides himself back inside her, rolling his hips against hers, building to a steady pace.

"Oh fuck, yes!" She cries after a few minutes, urging him on as she feels his thrusts get harder and deeper.

Harvey lets out a low guttural moan as he gets carried away, each thrust becoming more urgent. Donna's legs start to tremble as her orgasm approaches, Harvey continuing to fuck in to her as fast as he can as she desperately clings to his biceps.

"Come for me" He urges, his tongue fighting for dominance against hers as he kisses her deeply.

Donna's cries of pleasure only intensify as she ascends towards her peak and it's the change in motion of Harvey's hips that sends her over the edge.

"Ahh fuck, Donna" He moans, slamming in to her as he comes, Donna gripping the hair at the nape of his neck tightly as he slows the roll of his hips, fucking her slow and deep as he empties in to her.

Harvey kisses her neck and truly loves the sound of the giggle she lets out, "Okay, you proved it." She smiles, kissing his lips.

"Oh I haven't proved anything yes, Ms Paulsen" He grins, kissing her back.

They both lose track of how many times they have sex and how many orgasms they have that night.

* * *

When Harvey wakes the next day, he welcomes the soreness he is feeling in certain muscles, as he knows they can all be attributed to the rigorous sessions of lovemaking he and Donna shared last night. Images of last night flood his memory as he begins to properly wake up, he blinks as he opens his eyes, disarmed momentarily by the brightness of his bedroom, in their haste last night, he'd forgotten to draw the curtains. Adjusting to the brightness, he realizes the other side of the bed is empty.

"How are you up already after last night?" He calls out.

Thinking back to the many dreams he's had of her clad in his shirt, bringing him a cup of coffee, he awaits her eagerly.

"Donna?"

Getting up from the bed he notices the bathroom door open, so he proceeds straight to the kitchen instead, "Donna?" He calls out again.

Realization hits as he stands in his empty living room.

She's gone.

* * *

 _ **Dun, dun, dun!**_

 _ **Sorry guys, had to chuck a little angst in at the end, you're not ready for happy Darvey just yet are you? ;)**_

 _ **P.s. I totally think their first time after being apart would be hot and heavy and desperate, not all sweetness and love and gentle.**_

 _ **Please let me know what you think of the chapter!**_

 _ **x**_


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